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xneonlightsx

Offline (the 02/08/2016 at 2:47pm) | Search for a member

xneonlightsx

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 18 October 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1632
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About xneonlightsx : 20/F/Canada

xneonlightsx's page activity

Visits<b>CourtneyDanielle</b> - the 04/10/2010 at 9:27pm

xneonlightsx's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of xneonlightsx's badges

xneonlightsx's favorite FMLs

Today, the doctor let me know I have an autoimmune disease. The disease results in ulcers in my colon which bleed when I poop. I cried, but only when I was told that I wouldn't be allowed to eat cheese anymore. FML

#21364143
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31945) - you deserved it (3000)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:20pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I greeted my girlfriend with a spinning hug. She got motion sickness and threw up all over me. FML

#21362603
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29836) - you deserved it (8483)

On 02/24/2015 at 2:02pm - love - by hamboneghost (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I learned that, when choking on a piece of food, you can cough hard enough to partially prolapse a hemorrhoid. FML

#21362525
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27310) - you deserved it (2417)

On 02/24/2015 at 11:15am - health - by novaguy - United States

Today, I found out the hard way that blood-filled deer ticks can look a lot like black jelly beans. FML

#21360309
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32283) - you deserved it (8213)

On 02/21/2015 at 10:12am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my drinking problem became apparent when my daughter asked for a glass of juice, and I instinctively poured a large glass of scotch instead. FML

#21357563
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15922) - you deserved it (36403)

On 02/16/2015 at 8:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a friend tell me all about how being a vegan was so great. They were eating eggs. FML

#21353006
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30778) - you deserved it (2982)

On 02/09/2015 at 9:32pm - misc - by LunaCrow (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while in the waiting room at the dentist's, some kids were running and screaming. One of them stopped right beside me, turned to face me, and threw up in my lap. FML

#21350906
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33901) - you deserved it (2377)

On 02/06/2015 at 12:32pm - health - by alostr1 - United States

Today, in an effort to avoid my school's strict no-gum policy as my teacher made a b-line to me, I swallowed it. By the time the teacher reached me, the gum was on my desk, as well as my breakfast, thanks to my overactive gag reflex. FML

#21350431
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25486) - you deserved it (15393)

On 02/05/2015 at 4:03pm - misc - by gumchuck (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

#21346746
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29784) - you deserved it (8516)

On 01/30/2015 at 10:11am - intimacy - by Chemist-why (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, in an attempt to be romantic, I kissed my husband as passionately as I could. After, he looked at me and said, "You taste like Chinese food." FML

#21330815
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28341) - you deserved it (4961)

On 01/04/2015 at 6:14pm - love - by TimJack18 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my girlfriend of two years asked me why I would never tie her shoes for her. I confessed to her my deep hatred of feet. Later, I woke up from a nap next to my girlfriend. With her feet in my mouth. FML

#21321894
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34989) - you deserved it (6339)

On 12/22/2014 at 3:05am - love - by ScottyB - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my 7-year-old daughter loudly asked in the middle of the supermarket, "Mummy, what's a cunt?" FML

#21321028
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32426) - you deserved it (3721)

On 12/20/2014 at 5:42pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I found the Christmas candy that I'd hidden a year ago. Turns out I wasn't the only living creature who had found it. FML

#21311642
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25807) - you deserved it (7282)

On 12/04/2014 at 8:56pm - misc - by shugette212 - United States

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

#21286701
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28845) - you deserved it (37970)

On 10/27/2014 at 11:40pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Indiana)



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