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xfyre

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xfyre

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 14 October 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1853
  • Number of comments : 29
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

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xfyre's page activity

Visits<b>SnowYDG</b> - the 10/19/2013 at 12:44pm<b>julia_lynn</b> - the 11/12/2011 at 11:17pm<b>raphanne</b> - the 10/22/2011 at 12:17am<b>Mornai</b> - the 10/21/2011 at 4:15pm<b>fthislyfe</b> - the 09/15/2011 at 4:37pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:15pm<b>rachexl</b> - the 01/29/2010 at 3:24pm<b>aksteve</b> - the 12/01/2009 at 9:55pm

xfyre's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of xfyre's badges

xfyre's favorite FMLs

Today, I realized I can tell which one of my 6 roommates has taken a dump, just based on the smell emanating from the toilet. FML

#15861693
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29905) - you deserved it (3913)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:52pm - misc - by sosadstudent (woman) - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, I walked into the laundry room when my mom pulled a condom wrapper out of my pants pocket. She looked at me and said "you know you can't wash and reuse these." FML

#15846641
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25796) - you deserved it (20506)

On 04/19/2011 at 12:19pm - misc - by killercow - United States (Louisiana)

Today, my girlfriend compared my penis to an ewok from Star Wars. She says it's short, stubby, and fuzzy. Now she sings the Star Wars theme when we hang out. FML

#15817034
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42408) - you deserved it (8259)

On 04/17/2011 at 1:56am - intimacy - by rastafarimon (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

#15749213
780 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66774) - you deserved it (14048)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I realized that the best and most entertaining part of my 3 day mini vacation was realizing my nipples work on the touch screen of my iPhone. FML

#11628877
286 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27959) - you deserved it (9576)

On 07/03/2010 at 2:49am - misc - by thesadone - United States (California)

Today, at work, my stomach hurt and I passed gas for relief. Moments later, I discovered that my loose, silent "fart" was actually a wet, sneaky shart. The mess was beyond repair; I had to fake a family emergency and crept out of the office so that my coworkers wouldn't see my obvious crap stain. FML

#5796915
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31746) - you deserved it (8040)

On 10/12/2009 at 2:10pm - health - by Few_Absolutes (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I lost a bet with my girlfriend. I now have to wear a shirt saying "Worlds Smallest Penis" everywhere I go for a month. FML

#4627317
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18525) - you deserved it (61711)

On 08/18/2009 at 12:34pm - love - by badtimingdude (man) - Mauritius

Today, I was masturbating into a sock when I felt something on my cock. I quickly ripped the sock off and threw it on the floor... and watched a huge spider come scurrying out. I just inadvertently fucked a spider. FML

#278783
317 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52342) - you deserved it (98133)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:23pm - intimacy - by SpiderMan (man) - United States (Michigan)



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  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

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