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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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xfate

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xfate
  • Town/Country : Toronto, Canada
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 December 1994 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 374
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About xfate : julianah; 12.26.94 / sophomore in sept.

xfate's last visitors

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xfate's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

xfate's favorite FMLs

Today, my looks alone made a girl cry. FML

#8893190 (263)

I agree, your life sucks (20825) - you deserved it (3114)

On 03/07/2010 at 1:54pm - misc - by SadFace (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was on my computer when the girl that I really like instant-messages me. I went to type back, accidentally pressed control-V, and posted an entire article on how to remove genital warts. FML

#5579268 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (9848) - you deserved it (29144)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:58am - health - by Garrett (man) - United States (Oregon) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I walked out of my college dorm to see that the intelligent person who locked their bike next to mine decided as an added security they would lock their bike to the rack, and to my bike. FML

#5329801 (78)

I agree, your life sucks (29162) - you deserved it (1251)

On 09/18/2009 at 9:33am - misc - by cl512 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my family gathered to pray. It was my brother's turn to pray and he ended with this, "...and help Chev that he does not become the disappointment everyone expects him to be. Amen." I looked on in shock as my entire family nodded and said "Amen" in agreement. Hi, I'm Chev. FML

#5293926 (141)

I agree, your life sucks (31099) - you deserved it (3188)

On 09/16/2009 at 3:58pm - misc - by jaskyriddims (man) - Dominica (Saint George)

Today, after six months of dating, my girlfriend decided to break up with me because my "obsession" of being on the computer and playing games all the time was cutting into "our time". She then told me to "get a life" and never wanted to see me again. She told me all of this on WoW. FML

#4911322 (209)

I agree, your life sucks (19772) - you deserved it (36597)

On 08/29/2009 at 6:20pm - love - by zuper_duper (man) - United States (California)

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

#4903891 (269)

I agree, your life sucks (8927) - you deserved it (46554)

On 08/29/2009 at 11:13am - love - by coolhand (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#4728013 (154)

I agree, your life sucks (30185) - you deserved it (3655)

On 08/22/2009 at 2:29am - kids - by NoCookForYou (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I gathered the courage to ask my crush on a date. As I called her, she quickly answered and said "Can't talk right now, I'm in a movie theater." and then hung up. I'd called her home phone. FML

#4706873 (109)

I agree, your life sucks (29273) - you deserved it (1843)

On 08/21/2009 at 11:36am - love - by sophistication (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a paper cut while opening my box of Band-Aids. FML

#4566458 (179)

I agree, your life sucks (41336) - you deserved it (6746)

On 08/16/2009 at 3:05am - health - by irony (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boss asked me to call his new phone to make sure it's working. When his phone didn't ring, he looked at my phone to confirm I called him. My boss then saw that I'd entered him into my phonebook as "douche bag". FML

#4105054 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (8225) - you deserved it (53298)

On 07/28/2009 at 11:23am - work - by dotcomboy - United States

Today, I set up a camera in my kitchen to see who was stealing my cookies. Turns out my mom had her boyfriend over. Good news, the cookies are safe. Bad news, I now have something recorded that I never wanted to see in my life. FML

#3926899 (145)

I agree, your life sucks (33235) - you deserved it (9557)

On 07/21/2009 at 10:55am - misc - by Pimp-Daddy (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was talking to the girl I've liked for 2 years. We were assigned partners for a History project so we were going to work on it at my house. When she asked me for directions, I told her I lived on Woodcock Road. She yelled slapped me and stormed off. I was serious. FML

#3894865 (153)

I agree, your life sucks (41991) - you deserved it (1935)

On 07/20/2009 at 12:04am - love - by thicklysettled (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went into a restaurant and sat at a bar near three guys who appeared to be 19 or 20. They did not acknowledge me. 15 minutes later, my burger arrived. They all ran over to ask me about it. I haven't been hit on in months. My cheeseburger is more attractive to men than I am. FML

#3886225 (196)

I agree, your life sucks (33649) - you deserved it (4552)

On 07/19/2009 at 6:02pm - love - by Tasty (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after a night of partying, I woke up in the middle of my co-ed dorm lobby to the sound of giggles. I was in a thong with $1 monopoly bills sticking out. I'm a guy. FML

#3849129 (87)

I agree, your life sucks (10429) - you deserved it (33537)

On 07/18/2009 at 2:03am - misc - by joedoe (man) - United States (California)

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzle-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

#3816010 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (35221) - you deserved it (6535)

On 07/16/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by joe1234 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)