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xannycat's favorite FMLs
by idontwanttoknow / 06/16/2013 at 7:37am / United States / Intimacy
Today, after dating for almost a year, I decided to introduce my parents to the man I was sure I'd fallen in love with. When dad saw him, his and my boyfriend's face completely dropped. I asked them what was wrong because I could feel the discomfort. Turns out, I'm dating my dad's drug dealer. FML
by explanations / 06/14/2013 at 2:48am / United States (Illinois) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/13/2013 at 8:30pm / United Kingdom (Southampton) / Love
Today, I had to explain to my mother that a lace mini-dress with an obscene amount of cleavage was not appropriate to wear while meeting my boyfriend's parents. She called me an "annoying prude" and said that with my attitude, I don't deserve to have a man. FML
by kalisa anteater / 06/09/2013 at 4:49pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Miscellaneous
Today, I spent my last day at the hospital for a long epilepsy test. Apparently, I don't have epilepsy at all, but I do have extreme stress. This means that I've been taking several anti-seizure medications that ruined my college plans and made me sick for half a year, all for nothing. FML
by HollyJollyXmas / 06/09/2013 at 11:40am / United States / Health
Today, my 21-year-old girlfriend finally got the courage to tell her mom that she wanted to move in with me. It turns out she was right to be afraid; during the talk, her mother yelled at us, calling her a slut and saying she was too young to be "shacking up with some guy." FML
by MonsterInLaw / 06/08/2013 at 7:26pm / United States (Nebraska) / Love
by Anonymous / 06/08/2013 at 6:34am / United States (Alabama) / Intimacy
by hopeyoushityourintestinesout / 06/07/2013 at 8:16pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous
Today, my band and I played at our first ever real gig. Our drummer turned up high out of his damn mind. After ruining our act with his godawful performance, he screamed "HELL YEAH!" then ran and dove off the stage into a nearly non-existent audience. We were told to never come back. FML
by Anonymous / 06/07/2013 at 3:32pm / Canada (Quebec) / Work
by The Clitshank Redemption / 06/05/2013 at 7:11pm / United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire) / Love
by TooSunnyForSkin / 06/05/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Indiana) / Holidays
by tinypenis / 06/04/2013 at 8:15am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
by future burger flipper / 06/03/2013 at 3:22pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Money
Today, feeling the need to spice things up in our sex life, I dressed up in my husband's navy uniform jacket, hat, and a pair of heels. When he came into the room, he took one look at me and started laughing uncontrollably. FML
by anonymous / 06/03/2013 at 12:41am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, I witnessed a large woman pee on a pregnancy test in the middle of a Walmart parking lot, clean herself off, then wander around with the test hanging out of her mouth, waiting for her result. Where in the name of Christ do these people come from? FML
by Anonymous / 06/02/2013 at 2:10pm / United States / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 2Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…