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xannycat

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xannycat
  • Town/Country : Decatur, united states
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 841
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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xannycat's favorite FMLs

Today, after spending the weekend together, my ex turned nasty. I finally had the balls to tell him what a cruel asshole I think he is and really hit him where it hurts. I felt very empowered and strong. That is, until I realized I left my favourite and rather expensive jacket in his apartment. FML

#20854612
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35856) - you deserved it (14379)

On 08/26/2013 at 12:52am - love - by scorned_jacketless_lady (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML

#20792771
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35252) - you deserved it (31867)

On 07/19/2013 at 5:53pm - misc - by libraries are a girl's best friend (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, ten minutes into a blind date, my date said, "I don't mean to be rude, but... your face? It's the reason booze was invented." FML

#20792695
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49345) - you deserved it (4118)

On 07/19/2013 at 4:57pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Korea, Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, my husband wanted to try anal for the first time. His attempt to sound romantic was him saying, "Open your buns, the meat is ready." FML

#20767385
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52490) - you deserved it (7434)

On 07/06/2013 at 5:21pm - intimacy - by hamburger - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized that I am such a Grammar Nazi that when a porn star says something grammatically-incorrect, I lose my boner. FML

#20766909
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43314) - you deserved it (16943)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:42am - misc - by BlueB (man) - United States

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

#20766880
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41028) - you deserved it (4269)

On 07/06/2013 at 11:14am - misc - by StockedWithJuice (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a lovely letter from the council telling me I have to cease the act of "breeding and selling cats" because someone from my Facebook reported me. I'm pretty sure I've never owned a cat or had one in my house. FML

#20764172
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37776) - you deserved it (2393)

On 07/04/2013 at 10:26pm - misc - by suspicious (woman) - United States

Today, I returned home from an extended vacation only to find out my cousin wasn't kidding when he said he was going to steal my boyfriend. I thought I was dating a straight guy. FML

#20761976
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41250) - you deserved it (3025)

On 07/03/2013 at 4:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, what started off as an amazing date with my girlfriend ended with me driving her drunk ass home while she sat in the backseat making out with her new boyfriend. FML

Today, my step mom and her kids moved in. This is my first night sharing a room with her daughter. She snores, sleep talks, and sleep scratches the side of the bed creating a sound like nails on a chalkboard. FML

#20753919
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44560) - you deserved it (2928)

On 06/29/2013 at 6:01am - kids - by mskawaiibat - United States (California)

Today, I decided to go buy myself a dildo to use on my lonely nights. Once at the adult store, I also grabbed a birthday card to make it seem the dildo wasn't for me. At the register, the cashier looked at me and said, "For God's sake, save yourself some money. I already know it's for you." FML

#20742274
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54058) - you deserved it (20999)

On 06/23/2013 at 6:38am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my wife made me moist cat food burgers as a prank. I didnt have the heart to tell her that they tasted better than the ones she usually makes. FML

#20742017
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44041) - you deserved it (3574)

On 06/23/2013 at 1:05am - misc - by kittybad - United States

Today, I returned home from a month long trip overseas to find that my bird sitter has trained my parrot to whisper, "You're going to die" in a sinister voice. FML

#20731669
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46073) - you deserved it (6081)

On 06/17/2013 at 4:07pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML

#20731650
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69931) - you deserved it (6352)

On 06/17/2013 at 3:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I lost my virginity. Not only did my parents somehow find out, they posted about it on Facebook. FML

#20730822
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45067) - you deserved it (9326)

On 06/17/2013 at 1:54am - misc - by Anonymous - United States



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