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Offline (the 04/07/2015 at 3:16pm) | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 March 1993 (22 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3703
  • Number of comments : 1147
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

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xNephilim's page activity

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xNephilim's favorite FMLs

Today, while lying next to me, my boyfriend smiled and told me, "I really like your eyes. They're pretty." He paused and then finished with, "They really help your face." FML


I agree, your life sucks (54495) - you deserved it (3935)

On 04/10/2009 at 1:13pm - love - by ruvru - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at the orthodontist. As the lady was clipping my brackets, she missed and clipped my gums instead. She looked at me and said, "Oh sorry, you're bleeding really badly. See, I got these fake nails put on and I guess I'm just not used to them. Let me try again." She missed. FML


I agree, your life sucks (80835) - you deserved it (3055)

On 04/09/2009 at 8:33am - misc - by BracesSuck (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I went to a very nice reception at a hotel. I glanced inside the ballroom and saw that no one else was in there and, not wanting to be the first one there, I walked past and into the stairway. Turns out, I had walked into the emergency exit stairs and had to set off the alarm to get out. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12054) - you deserved it (47265)

On 04/06/2009 at 2:16am - misc - by rmo1776 (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I gave a campus tour to a group of high school seniors. As I was showing off the dorms, one student asks, "Are these beds sturdy enough for threesomes?" Before I could respond, another kid shouts, "How would he know, I bet the only action he gets in bed is from his left hand." She's correct. FML


I agree, your life sucks (105071) - you deserved it (11290)

On 03/23/2009 at 2:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was standing on a balcony smoking a cigarette when I noticed a woman giving me strange looks. When I put the cigarette out and went to walk inside she said "You shouldn't smoke while you're pregnant." I'm not pregnant. FML


I agree, your life sucks (66483) - you deserved it (15029)

On 03/11/2009 at 8:04pm - misc - by justfat - United States (Arizona)

Today, my fiance told me that he no longer loves me, that he still has feelings for an ex. The wedding is off and he needs the ring back to give to the right woman. FML


I agree, your life sucks (74829) - you deserved it (3667)

On 02/03/2009 at 12:08pm - love - by nolongerengaged (woman) - United States

Today, I was putting a wristband on a little boy's wrist so he could swim in the waterpark. Just before I finished, he coughed all over my hands and arms. I finished and looked up at the boy just in time for us to make eye contact and for him to cough directly into my face. FML


I agree, your life sucks (22476) - you deserved it (2317)

On 01/17/2009 at 3:57pm - kids - by kallens - United States (Minnesota)

C comme Line's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

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  • Hi gang! It’s a day of national pride over near the FML offices. There's a time for everything, and even if the desire to piss about to release the tension is huge, we mustn’t forget that we can…

Friday 27 November 2015

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