xNephilim

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Offline (the 04/07/2015 at 3:16pm)

xNephilim

7Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 6 March 1993 (23 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4243
  • Number of comments : 1147
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 31 posted

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xNephilim's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 09/08/2016 at 12:34am<b>Aeriyx</b> - the 09/07/2016 at 8:28pm<b>Scootythedog</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 11:51am<b>paigexox0</b> - the 08/03/2016 at 4:56am<b>Chibster</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 5:29pm<b>fuckit10000</b> - the 07/26/2016 at 5:41am<b>xWyattEarpx</b> - the 07/06/2016 at 11:33pm<b>hereforfmls</b> - the 07/04/2016 at 5:03am<b>CREA</b> - the 07/03/2016 at 2:09pm<b>LadyAthena</b> - the 06/27/2016 at 11:53pm<b>WCARlover</b> - the 06/26/2016 at 11:46pm<b>Jayms</b> - the 06/22/2016 at 3:28am<b>Bostern</b> - the 06/20/2016 at 6:24am<b>hmrhoades</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 9:03am<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 3:15pm<b>captain_hero89</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 1:40pm<b>Shadowvoid</b> - the 06/08/2016 at 5:02pm<b>eyepuppy</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 6:54am

Fucked!<b>Scootythedog</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 5:51pm<b>Diarrhea_Volcano</b> - the 06/11/2016 at 9:15pm<b>miss_fluffybutt</b> - the 04/17/2016 at 12:54am<b>niksatter96</b> - the 06/27/2015 at 9:48pm<b>Noelletakumi</b> - the 06/19/2015 at 11:34pm<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 04/10/2015 at 12:56am<b>AvengingAngelx</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 6:00am

xNephilim's FML badges

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of xNephilim's badges

xNephilim's favorite FMLs

Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

by dukebluedevils13 / 08/04/2011 at 9:47pm / United States (Colorado) / Animals

Today, my daughter wouldn't stop yapping on about not being able to register on the new Harry Potter website. The amount of whiny jibber-jabber emanating from her cake-hole made me want to boot her from our family tree, and I had to resort to booze to wash the pain away. I'm a terrible parent. FML

by makeitstop / 08/04/2011 at 9:41am / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I forced myself into work with severe laryngitis. Normally this wouldn't be an issue, except I work at candy and ice cream store at a major tourist destination. For seven hours I had to communicate with unsympathetic adults and screaming, bratty kids by miming and using a dry erase board. FML

by Anonymous / 07/17/2011 at 7:29pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I was flipping through a magazine and saw an ad that had the line "No corn, no wheat, no soy", all of which I'm severely allergic to. I got so excited at the prospect of having a food I could eat, I fell out of my chair. I then realized it was an ad for dog food. FML

by ChelseaRae / 07/06/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Health

Today, my husband asked me to come see his turd. After saying no, he said, "What kind of wife are you?" FML

by randomjulz / 06/15/2011 at 11:53pm / United States / Love

Today, I had to lie to my female roommate about what happened last night. She was drunk and spent half the night cuddling with me and trying to get me to kiss her. I've loved this girl for two years, but I promised her I wouldn't let her cheat on her boyfriend with anyone. Even me. FML

by anonymous / 06/15/2011 at 2:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Love

Today, I was complimented on my hat by two different people. I wasn't wearing a hat. FML

by AndieApocalypse / 06/03/2011 at 12:21am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the beach, my little sister thought it would be cute to feed a small seagull some of her food. Minutes later a flock of seagulls swarmed and attacked me and my sandwich. FML

by ihateseagulls / 04/07/2011 at 7:28pm / United States (Michigan) / Animals

Today, my mom banned me from watching The Simpsons and Family Guy because apparently, they're part of "the Devil's plan to corrupt God's children". FML

by Jonathan / 03/18/2011 at 5:40pm / Denmark (Midtjyllen) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML

by Megara / 03/15/2011 at 1:58am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new boyfriend was at my flat for the first time. He picked up something in the bathroom and said 'What the hell's this?'. I told him what it was for, and he said 'You girls and your weird female products. Who needs all this stuff?'. It wasn't a female thing. It was shampoo. FML

by cleangirl / 03/14/2011 at 7:45pm / United Kingdom (Fife) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found a picture my husband had saved on the computer. It was of me, and he had named it "Fatter". FML

by just great... / 02/22/2011 at 3:38am / Love

Today, I found out about my parent's divorce over Facebook. FML

by MissCommunicate / 02/05/2011 at 10:36am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I saw a girl on the subway that I knew so I started waving frantically. She gave me a really weird expression and moved quickly away from me. Then I realised that I only knew her because I had stalked her Facebook once. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 11:30am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Transportation

Today, I went over to welcome this new couple to our subdivision with a bottle of wine and muffins. I told them I liked what they were doing with the place, then asked them when they had moved in. They replied, "Two years ago." FML

by Anonymous / 12/14/2010 at 10:02am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous