wolverine47

Search for a member

Offline (the 07/13/2016 at 5:33am)

wolverine47

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1994
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

wolverine47's page activity

Visits<b>tiger820</b> - the 07/12/2016 at 10:28am<b>isabelc</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 10:34pm<b>Z3R0G5</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 6:45am<b>Rallred32</b> - the 06/12/2014 at 7:44pm<b>KazuTrumpet1512</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 1:48am<b>Ytram</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 11:08pm<b>lenardMcCravits</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 6:46pm<b>randomgirl4728</b> - the 01/03/2014 at 7:18pm<b>Kelly_Bean6</b> - the 08/18/2013 at 12:40am<b>EverestMelting</b> - the 04/22/2013 at 11:40pm<b>JefftheRipper</b> - the 01/10/2013 at 7:11pm<b>zombieslayer83</b> - the 01/01/2013 at 6:08pm<b>freakincool</b> - the 08/04/2012 at 2:45am

wolverine47's FML badges

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of wolverine47's badges

wolverine47's favorite FMLs

Today, my little brother was feeling like the god damned bratty douchebag he is and hurled a basketball at me. It missed, hit the wall, and rebounded straight into his face. He burst into tears, and I'm now grounded because my parents believed him when he said I threw it at him. FML

by vreenya / 04/08/2014 at 4:13pm / Chile (Region Metropolitana) / Kids

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

by Spooprfailed / 04/08/2014 at 1:32am / Canada (Manitoba) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML

by AlonsoKold / 04/07/2014 at 7:39pm / United States (Michigan) / Love

Today, while playing basketball, my friend thanked me for passing the ball to him. I was too embarrassed to tell him that that was me shooting. FML

by DetergentFrog6 / 04/07/2014 at 4:54pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was treating a patient at the hospital where I'm a dentist. This particular gentleman was old and slightly deaf. After completing the procedure I gestured to the spitoon and asked him to spit. He got up, steadied himself, and spat straight in my face. FML

by Dr.Anonymous / 03/22/2014 at 7:56am / India (Maharashtra) / Work

Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML

by BMTH2296 / 03/21/2014 at 7:42pm / United States / Geek

Today, my boyfriend decided it was time to spice up our sex life. He now watches Sons Of Anarchy when we have sex. FML

by Anonymous / 03/19/2014 at 10:43pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boss told me that there is no point in making me cut onions anymore because every time I do, I look like I've "been beaten", and can't be seen by the customers for at least half an hour. FML

by Embarassed / 03/19/2014 at 6:24pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work

Today, I decided to clean my apartment from top to bottom. Once I was done, I looked over at my puppy, who then woke up, stretched, got out of his basket and started to pee. I shouted, "No!" Scared, he then ran all over the place, still peeing. FML

by Shiva / 03/18/2014 at 4:46am / France (Poitou-Charentes) / Animals

Today, my mother taught my 98-year-old great-uncle to knock on the wall if he needs us. He can't remember who we are; but every hour he can remember to knock to ask, "Is it breakfast yet?" FML

by can't sleep / 03/18/2014 at 4:36am / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I marched in the St. Patrick's day parade. My horn has an inconveniently-placed spit valve that has to be drained frequently. At the end, I discovered every time I emptied it, it would spray all over the front of my pants. I marched an entire parade looking like I pissed my pants. FML

by Bandking / 03/17/2014 at 5:48pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I waited on a gentleman and his lady friend at my restaurant. They ordered some of the most expensive items on the menu, and I thought I'd get a nice tip. Instead, he tipped me a scrap of paper, containing a drawing of a cock jizzing on a caricature of my face, and the word "Thanks." FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2014 at 2:53pm / United States (New York) / Work

Today, I walked into my elderly client's home for my first day of work. I was immediately hit in the eye with something small, and had to get medical attention for a scratched cornea. It turns out my client likes to clip his toenails right by his front door. FML

by Anonymous / 03/16/2014 at 10:00am / United States (Michigan) / Health

Today, I followed my wife out, since she's been acting strangely lately and I was suspicious. She met up with a guy at a restaurant, who she later claimed was her brother. Either she's cheating on me, or it's tradition in her family to make out and grope each other at the end of meals. FML

by broken vows / 03/15/2014 at 5:48pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I went on a date. As I hugged him, I felt tingles. As a big believer in clichés, I thought it was the tingles of falling in love. Turns out, it was my allergic reaction to his cologne. I now look like I burned my face. FML

by Burning Love / 03/15/2014 at 3:35am / United States (Arizona) / Love