wildthang428

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Offline (the 10/17/2014 at 4:09am)

wildthang428

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Friday 4 September 1987 (28 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 517
  • Number of comments : 33
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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wildthang428's page activity

Visits<b>Frowny</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 7:58pm<b>DeadshotDaquiri</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 10:57pm<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 12:49am<b>je83185</b> - the 01/20/2014 at 12:48am<b>bearbear120</b> - the 06/27/2013 at 12:46pm<b>MrsWojtowicz</b> - the 11/29/2012 at 1:37pm<b>Strychnine</b> - the 11/29/2012 at 1:35pm<b>Riliana</b> - the 11/29/2012 at 9:21am<b>MzMegs</b> - the 11/29/2012 at 9:10am<b>MiloBear</b> - the 11/29/2012 at 7:20am<b>dessaye</b> - the 08/16/2012 at 12:58am<b>wittgenstein</b> - the 02/11/2012 at 8:10pm<b>rallets</b> - the 01/06/2012 at 10:21pm<b>angelofmusic89</b> - the 11/12/2011 at 9:01am<b>ericalew_xo</b> - the 08/05/2009 at 2:25pm

wildthang428's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of wildthang428's badges

wildthang428's favorite FMLs

Today, I learned my neighbor can access my wireless printer from his house after it started printing off pictures of what I'm assuming is his penis. FML

by itsrathersmall / 01/15/2013 at 4:58pm / United States (North Dakota) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

by Bella / 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

by TheVirginJenny / 10/06/2012 at 8:05pm / United States (Washington) / Kids

Today, I took a pregnancy test. I was disappointed it was negative, as my fiancé and I have been together for four years and have a strong relationship. He danced with happiness when he discovered the test was negative and tried to high-five me. FML

by BeforeItWasCool / 09/30/2012 at 5:30am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I had to bail on yet another date with an awesome guy. Every time I make a date, my hateful mother slips laxatives into my food so I'm glued to the shitter until 2am. This is the fourth time. FML

by Lauren / 08/19/2012 at 11:53pm / United States (Iowa) / Love

Today, wanting to be romantic, I came home with flowers, and told my girlfriend I love her and that I never want us to fall apart. Before I could finish my second sentence, she farted, said, "Aww, that's so sweet" and quickly excused herself to the bathroom. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2012 at 8:12pm / United States / Love

Today, I went bra shopping with my mother. She insisted that I try on a bunch of push-up bras, and I told her I didn't want to, because it's false advertising. She looked at me and said that I need all the help I can get. FML

by historyfreak_17 / 06/17/2012 at 3:11am / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I spoke at length about how we were going to handle things, which included him "forbidding" me from having an epidural, because he doesn't want our baby to "come out addicted to drugs." FML

by CalyenaL / 05/12/2012 at 9:35pm / Mexico (Baja California) / Health

Today, after suffering with bad constipation and having to eat special bread to get me to go, I have practically just pooped out a week's worth of food in 15 minutes, and I'm still going. I've passed the ring of fire stage, now I just can't feel my asshole. FML

by awhmaaan / 02/27/2012 at 10:55am / United Kingdom / Health

Today, I saw a man dancing to a Britney Spears song in his Volkswagen Beetle. I started laughing hysterically until he got out. He was huge. I was stuck in traffic. FML

by Anonymous / 10/06/2011 at 1:04pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I went to Walmart to pick up some groceries. When I came out, the front end of my car was crushed in. On the window was a note only saying "Sorry I bumped into your car." FML

by This Guy / 09/26/2011 at 1:18pm / United States / Money

Today, I was in the elevator with my boss, when I let rip the vilest, most horrifying fart of my life as we left the first floor. We stood in silence as the elevator slowly ascended to the 21st floor, leaving us to marinate in the fumes. FML

by / 06/05/2011 at 4:45pm / United States / Health

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

by Mike / 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm / Health

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting intimate and planning on having sex for the first time. I picked her up off the couch, and in so doing, accidentally lifted her too high, putting her head through the ceiling. She had a mild concussion. FML

by Ouch / 04/25/2011 at 3:31pm / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Love