whereismyb4con

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/26/2015 at 8:27pm)

whereismyb4con

28Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2416
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About whereismyb4con : Lover of video games, food, dinosaurs, animals, tv, naps, and whining

Slayer of bacon, lover of books, connoisseur of racist jokes

whereismyb4con's page activity

Visits<b>LivToFail</b> - the 06/10/2016 at 10:41pm<b>clairecurses</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 4:24pm<b>natashamilan</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 1:46pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 9:09pm<b>brentt2711</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 7:55am<b>softpaws</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 6:47am<b>hotheadslav</b> - the 11/09/2015 at 6:25pm<b>mds9986</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 12:04am<b>charrbee90</b> - the 09/17/2015 at 6:17am<b>Liamwme</b> - the 08/22/2015 at 4:41pm<b>julia_adamec</b> - the 08/18/2015 at 9:56am<b>lola4455</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 7:53am<b>sulvan182</b> - the 08/11/2015 at 5:44am<b>Michelle1121</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 10:47pm<b>iAlissa</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 3:31pm<b>10nachoman10</b> - the 07/19/2015 at 4:17am<b>uhmhaicats</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 11:46am<b>LeFrancaisRaleur</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 10:50am

Fucked!<b>mds9986</b> - the 10/12/2015 at 6:04am<b>melisssa87</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 12:31am<b>AngelOf_Darkness</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:22pm<b>karcummings</b> - the 04/08/2015 at 9:47pm<b>kikoma</b> - the 03/24/2015 at 9:11am<b>teresa96706</b> - the 03/17/2015 at 9:39pm<b>swaggyswagswag</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 4:27am<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 3:46am<b>annarcheer</b> - the 03/09/2015 at 2:36am<b>snarkytruth</b> - the 03/07/2015 at 3:34am<b>molly471</b> - the 03/04/2015 at 12:32am<b>charrbee90</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 1:53pm<b>lolonewsom</b> - the 03/03/2015 at 5:53am<b>Pandacupcakelove</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 10:03pm<b>emmatheamazingx</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 6:03am<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 11:24pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 12:14am<b>UhHuhHoney</b> - the 02/03/2015 at 2:32am

whereismyb4con's FML badges

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of whereismyb4con's badges

whereismyb4con's favorite FMLs

Today, I put an anonymous note under my neighbour's door asking them to not have sex so loudly during the day. Since then, I haven't heard any sex. Unfortunately, I have heard a woman crying loudly because she just found out about her husband's affair. FML

by Anonymous / 09/22/2010 at 3:04pm / United Kingdom (Northamptonshire) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of three months texted me saying he loves me. I excitedly started texting back, "I love you too." Before I even got done, he messaged again saying, "Can you send a pic of your tits to me now?" FML

by luvlessbootycall / 07/24/2010 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend of three months texted me saying he loves me. I excitedly started texting back, "I love you too." Before I even got done, he messaged again saying, "Can you send a pic of your tits to me now?" FML

by luvlessbootycall / 07/24/2010 at 1:23am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, me and a couple of friends decided to go camping in a national park . When we got there, a ranger came up to us and said, "There have been many sightings of coyotes, don't worry, if they charge you, they'll bluff and flee at the last moment." We met a coyote, it didn't bluff. FML

by Coyote / 05/17/2010 at 7:00pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Animals

Today, I came back from a week long class trip. My mother took it upon herself to replace my bed sheets and clean my room. Apparently, she found a note under my mattress from my ex-boyfriend. It said "For all you future dudes, Connor was here first!" FML

by FASHlONABLE / 04/05/2010 at 3:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, at a debate tournament based on domestic abuse, my partner yells out, "Has anyone considered that maybe the women DESERVED to be beaten?" FML

by Username / 03/16/2010 at 8:46pm / Love

Today, my schlong decided to enter Mortal Kombat with my pants zipper. Guess which of the two won a flawless victory? FML

by liu_kang / 03/16/2010 at 2:55pm / United States / Health

Today, someone gave me a note to pass along to a girl in class. The note had the girl's name surrounded by hearts. When I gave it to her, she assumed it was a love note from me, and said "Not in a million years, fat ass" before I could say it was from someone else. FML

by Crappyfayman / 02/22/2010 at 9:46pm / United States (Arizona) / Love

Today, I was eating in the food court at the mall by myself but then a cute guy from my school offers to sit by me, I say yes of course, he then asks me for a french fry. Later on I realize he has eaten half my meal. He only wanted to sit by me for my food. FML

by purpledp12 / 02/11/2010 at 4:12am / United States / Love

Today, I went on a blind date. We were walking in the park and I noticed a funny smell. I looked down and realized I stepped in dog crap. I tried to nonchalantly rub it off on the grass, but instead hit a patch of wet grass and slipped onto my butt, right into a pile of goose poop. FML

by Juanna / 01/13/2010 at 3:07am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, after I bathed my nine month old, I laid her on my bed to grab a diaper. I turned around to see that she'd peed on my comforter. I then put her in her playpen to put my cover in the wash. I came back into the room to get her, and saw she'd taken off her diaper. She'd crapped in her playpen. FML

by raebay / 11/04/2009 at 8:23pm / United States (Mississippi) / Kids

Today, I found out that my sister who is 16 years older than me is actually my biological mother. She and my parents decided it was best that I didn't know who my real mother was, and to be raised by my grandparents as their child. I've always hated my sister. FML

by dinosaurman / 10/07/2009 at 12:07pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML

by awilson / 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that my son is not really gay. He just told me that so I'd let him have girls in his bedroom. FML

by Pumpkin / 07/17/2009 at 10:00pm / United States (Texas) / Kids