vondie440

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Offline (the 05/16/2014 at 3:37pm)

vondie440

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 3 January 1989 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 151
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About vondie440 : I'm married living in the midwest of the United States. I have 1 son with another child on the way. I work in a restaurant and live a pretty normal life.

vondie440's page activity

Visits<b>immaloser95</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 6:47am<b>Katiekhalifa</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 1:00pm<b>Ian_from_0070</b> - the 10/28/2013 at 8:51pm

vondie440's FML badges

Consolation prize

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Keen reader – Level: master ninja

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Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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vondie440's favorite FMLs

Today, I was reading in my apartment. Due to a heatwave and my lack of AC, I was completely naked. My cat jumped onto my lap, and as her claws dug into my stomach, I recoiled. This caused her to retreat, clawing at my nether regions in the process. My pussy mauled my pussy. FML

by Anonymous / 07/29/2013 at 5:18pm / United States / Animals

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, my son said, "Mommy, sometimes my pee-pee goes up like a stick." I replied, "Well, honey, that's normal and okay." I then asked when it happens, to which he said, "Well, sometimes when watching Scooby Doo and Shaggy comes out dressed in lady clothes." FML

by ScoobieDoo / 03/20/2009 at 12:15am / United States (Washington) / Kids