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vmk9707

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vmk9707
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  • Number of visits : 34
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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vmk9707's favorite FMLs

Today, I kissed a boy for the first time in over a year. It was at drama club practice, and he quickly ended up asking the director if we could remove that scene from the play. FML

#20114767
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17381) - you deserved it (1934)

On 10/13/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by pinkfreak94 - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He decided that the best time would be while I was giving him a blowjob. He then seemed confused as to why I didn't finish. FML

#20114701
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30978) - you deserved it (2954)

On 10/13/2012 at 8:04am - intimacy - by notthebesttime -

Today, after saving up for weeks, I bought myself an iPad. Because mine is better than the one my parents bought my ten-year-old brother, he got pissed and threw it into our pool. I'm now grounded for getting angry and calling him a bastard in the aftermath. FML

#20112275
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31295) - you deserved it (2000)

On 10/11/2012 at 4:37pm - misc - by future missing person maker person thingy (woman) - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, I went on a blind date. Sadly, I wasn't blind enough. FML

#20111868
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8072) - you deserved it (22210)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:02am - love - by goodeyesight (man) - Brazil (Sao Paulo)

Today, as I was about to leave for work, my 16-year-old son stumbled home in nothing but his underwear and pink cowboy boots. He threw his hands in the air, yelled, "BOTTLE SIP BOTTLE GUZZLE," promptly threw up and passed out in it. FML

#20111636
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21032) - you deserved it (3807)

On 10/11/2012 at 2:59am - kids - by Failed Parent - United States

Today, I was walking home when I saw an elderly woman struggling with a large bag of garbage. I asked if I could help. I got it all the way to the dumpster and the bag ripped. Inside were about fourteen dead cats. FML

Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML

#20110803
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25601) - you deserved it (4017)

On 10/10/2012 at 5:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Manitoba)

Today, I discovered that my 12-year-old son has secretly been printing out and selling copies of the suggestive photos from my camera that I'd taken for my husband. He's been selling them to kids at school for a dollar each. FML

#20103277
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11434) - you deserved it (27437)

On 10/05/2012 at 7:02pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

#20102415
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45194) - you deserved it (1820)

On 10/05/2012 at 1:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to my cat meowing, with her dilated vagina in my face, giving birth to her first litter of kittens. FML

#20099894
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30000) - you deserved it (4272)

On 10/03/2012 at 12:29pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my daughter and her boyfriend excitedly told me that after months of trying they are finally pregnant and that I'm going to be a grandmother. This would be great news if they weren't 15. FML

#20077962
31 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41185) - you deserved it (5960)

On 09/18/2012 at 4:20pm - health - by GMD (woman) - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my wife and I got in a 4-hour heated argument which resulted in her begging for a divorce and admitting that she cheated on me. This all started with us arguing about the instructions for our new IKEA table. FML

#20043524
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22359) - you deserved it (1566)

On 08/26/2012 at 10:56pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my fiancée informed me she'd invited her ex-husband to our wedding at her parents' request. FML

#19480512
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21254) - you deserved it (1641)

On 04/16/2012 at 8:57pm - love - by Tony (man) - United States

Today, I was driving home from work with the window down. I felt what I thought was rain coming through the window, until I looked over and realized it was urine mist coming from the cattle truck next to me. FML

#18195085
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28635) - you deserved it (2807)

On 11/08/2011 at 6:33pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, in high school, we had a presentation about sex, condoms, etc. After a while, the lady explained that we should get to know our sexual organs better. "For example, my daughter looks at her vagina in front of a mirror to check it out." I’m her daughter. FML

#14614725
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57006) - you deserved it (5879) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 3:13pm - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - Belgium - Chosen by the cast of Skins



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