Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

vincelu09

Search for a member

vincelu09
  • Town/Country : Toronto
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 19 February 1991 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 183
  • Number of comments : 14
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

vincelu09's last visitors

mydumblifesuckshannaxo28carminecris89

vincelu09's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of vincelu09's badges

vincelu09's favorite FMLs

Today, after years of counseling and therapy for my anger issues, I snapped. Two words: Flappy Bird. FML

#21051812
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42671) - you deserved it (12102)

On 02/05/2014 at 10:39pm - misc - by tigerisabelle (woman) -

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML

#20988758
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39745) - you deserved it (6307)

On 12/11/2013 at 8:14am - misc - by pootie (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, while in bed, my boyfriend pointed to my stomach and said, "Bad fat", then pointed to my boobs and said, "Good fat." FML

#20906869
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48602) - you deserved it (6706)

On 10/04/2013 at 4:20am - misc - by f.a.t. (woman) - Australia

Today, I walked in on my daughter shaving the testicles of her boyfriend, who had apparently snuck in through her window. FML

#20888905
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50466) - you deserved it (5069)

On 09/20/2013 at 12:30pm - intimacy - by disappointed (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, every time I write the word "analyst," I can't help but giggle because it begins with "anal." I'm 24, and studying to be a conflict analyst. FML

#20886867
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18259) - you deserved it (27886)

On 09/18/2013 at 6:59pm - work - by Sunny (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went on a new medicine. One of the listed side-effects was "anal seepage" and I spent the better part of the day laughing with my coworkers about how it's "not a real side-effect". I found out that it really is while stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic on the way home. FML

#20839551
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36154) - you deserved it (8444)

On 08/15/2013 at 11:18pm - health - by stinky car - United States (Alabama)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40214) - you deserved it (4657)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54790) - you deserved it (6482)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to my local pool. I lay down in a chair and started tanning. About 30 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "Put that away, you pervert, there are children here!" I had a hole in my pants and my penis had started to poke through. FML

#20772281
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50033) - you deserved it (20069)

On 07/09/2013 at 12:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while using a urinal in a very busy mall bathroom, another man unzipped his pants and attempted to use the same one as me. FML

#20751757
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47694) - you deserved it (2692)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:16am - health - by not cool (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37973) - you deserved it (12722)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, I went to a local Indian takeaway, since I'm from India originally, and none of my friends speak Hindi. I went up to the counter and placed my order in Hindi with the seemingly Indian owner. He gave me a weird look and said, "Huh? Speak English, ya rimjob." FML

#20669248
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39796) - you deserved it (11270)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

#20642182
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46646) - you deserved it (3739)

On 05/05/2013 at 12:14am - work - by ADickySituation - United States (Illinois)

Today, my former fiancée, who I stopped seeing 5 months ago, married another guy. She wore the dress that I'd purchased for our would-be wedding. FML

#20630309
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54455) - you deserved it (5012)

On 04/29/2013 at 1:07pm - love - by Good Luck Chuck (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was on hold with the cable company for an hour. When I finally got someone, I walked into the kitchen to where it was quiet and slid across the floor, falling on my butt and losing my connection on the phone. My 2-year-old son had sprayed the floor with nonstick cooking spray. FML



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: