victus

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Offline (the 02/05/2016 at 2:54am)

victus

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1994
  • Number of comments : 25
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About victus : Hmmm.. well, I like elephants, am an avid runner, and live a rather boring life. Not much else to say, if you have any questions feel free to ask!

victus's page activity

Visits<b>LickitungJr</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 12:26am<b>tralala453</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 10:27am<b>jesnake</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 8:14am<b>awaydoggy</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 5:23am<b>_Y0L0_</b> - the 02/10/2013 at 2:26am<b>Livestrong14</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 10:09pm<b>iOceanus</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 1:31am<b>Gunnie</b> - the 01/21/2013 at 2:19pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/19/2013 at 3:28pm<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 01/17/2013 at 5:22am<b>maz95</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 8:15pm<b>Teen_Facts</b> - the 01/16/2013 at 9:20am

victus's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of victus's badges

victus's favorite FMLs

Today, I was T-boned while going through an intersection. The guy who hit me accused me of not using my turn signal. I was going straight. FML

by mdp624 / 08/16/2012 at 8:10am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, I was pitching at a fastpitch softball game. The other team chanted about the ball being too high and almost hitting the batter in the eye. After throwing the next pitch, the ball was savagely returned by the batter, straight into my eyes. FML

by Anonymous / 08/08/2012 at 12:00pm / United States / Health

Today, while doing my job as a cart clerk, a gentleman went around the parking lot and picked some trash up, trying to help out. Faith in humanity: +1. About an hour later I saw a woman pick a bug off of her windshield and eat it. Faith in humanity: -200. FML

by TJ / 08/08/2012 at 7:23am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, I was at a Chinese buffet, and I got a fortune cookie. I opened it, and it said, "The love of your life is sitting across from you". The only thing across from me was an empty chair. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 4:13pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I discovered that I sometimes talk in my sleep. After spending an amazing, perfectly romantic night with my boyfriend, I woke up to him telling me to leave. I have no idea what I could have said. He still won't talk to me. FML

by Anonymous / 08/07/2012 at 10:49am / United States / Love

Today, I saw the girl that I've had a crush on forever riding her horse on the side of the road. She waved, and without thinking, I honked my horn in response. Her horse bucked her off. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2012 at 7:31pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals

Today, my neighbors are moving. As we were saying our goodbyes, their 12-year-old son approached and thanked me for the times I forgot to shut the blinds and he watched me change. FML

by oops123 / 07/16/2012 at 10:38am / United States / Kids

Today, I bought a home at a bargain. It will need 5 grand in repairs to fix plumbing and electric, but it's mine. When I pulled up the listing to show pictures to my friends, there was a new listing that was in the same neighborhood, and a larger, nicer house that is move in ready. Same price. FML

by jenjam / 07/04/2012 at 8:50pm / Money

Today, I met my biological parents for the first time. Their justification for giving me up for adoption was that I wasn't conceived at the ideal time for them. Apparently, the ideal time was six months after the adoption, when they conceived the first of my two brothers. FML

by pon-3 / 06/22/2012 at 5:13pm / United Kingdom (Derby) / Kids

Today, when I told my family I was a vegetarian, I expected them to make fun of me because that's just my family. But what I wasn't expecting was my dad to use raw meat as a puppet and make it say, "Eat me! Eat me!" then throw it at my face. FML

by Anonymous / 06/21/2012 at 10:52am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I laughed when I shouldn't have and am probably fired. What happened? My boss asked me if birds were reptiles. I thought he was kidding. FML

by notanidiot / 06/20/2012 at 8:46am / United States (Michigan) / Work

Today, I was once again passed over for a promotion. I'm now the assistant to a kid who has failed to meet almost every single responsibility he's been given before. It's my job to make sure he's successful, and if he isn't, I'll lose my job. FML

by wenchfucker / 06/18/2012 at 3:49pm / France (Lorraine) / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad approached two girls at a store and told them I'd crashed into their car. They didn't find it funny either. FML

by annonymous / 06/17/2012 at 9:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boss gave me a new assignment at work: go online and look for my own replacement, then interview him. FML

by Anonymous / 06/17/2012 at 4:50am / United Kingdom (Manchester) / Work

Today, my sister asked me if I was going to be getting married "for real" this time, because she didn't want to waste her money like she did on my previous engagement. The reason that one didn't work out in the first place is because she slept with my fiancé. FML

by Anonymous / 06/16/2012 at 3:03pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love