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vespergreen

Offline (the 11/04/2014 at 1:58am) | Search for a member

vespergreen

8Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2524
  • Number of comments : 20
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About vespergreen : I got to stay high all my life to forget I'm missing you.

vespergreen's page activity

Visits<b>Rebekahxxx</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 5:55pm<b>karaanne21</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 9:00pm<b>christian1509</b> - the 11/02/2014 at 3:43pm<b>robsmit98</b> - the 10/31/2014 at 6:01pm<b>parkerhicks__</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 9:24pm<b>Wolverine33</b> - the 10/29/2014 at 4:33pm<b>allybae_aye</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:15pm<b>Journiexo</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 10:14pm<b>Naaaah</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 4:15pm<b>Paultheouctopus</b> - the 10/19/2014 at 3:32am<b>travisrwr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:34pm<b>thepurplewalrus</b> - the 10/17/2014 at 5:03pm<b>ulises575</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 12:24pm<b>Nolanation97</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 6:16am<b>minutepoet</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:44pm<b>gurbism</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 1:26am<b>sirpantselot</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 1:00am<b>Rfads5</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 10:20pm

Liked!<b>dakatabg</b> - the 11/03/2014 at 5:24am<b>christian1509</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 11:12pm<b>minutepoet</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 5:44am<b>hobosapien081</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 11:45pm<b>IspSG</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 11:39pm<b>isorang</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 4:22pm<b>alitaba21fx</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 12:42pm<b>vanessa_tranz</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 5:16am

vespergreen's FML badges

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vespergreen's favorite FMLs

Today, I got fired from my job. Why? Apparently taking 10 minutes to take a shit is too long for some people. FML

#21219077
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42664) - you deserved it (7744)

On 07/24/2014 at 5:05am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)

Today, I got the, "It's not you, it's me" speech for the third breakup in a row. I'm beginning to think that they may not be entirely telling me the truth. FML

#21217897
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40653) - you deserved it (6361)

On 07/23/2014 at 12:09am - love - by swiggityswooty - United States (California)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35156) - you deserved it (11507)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I discovered that the odd creaking noise I hear when I walk down the stairs is actually a crack that had been getting larger over the years. I found out when I fell through and plummeted to the stairs below. FML

#21216856
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41015) - you deserved it (5187)

On 07/21/2014 at 11:46pm - misc - by Oldhouse (man) - United States (California)

Today, as I was on the couch taking a nap, it started violently shaking. I panicked and chased my family outside, convinced it was an earthquake. It was just the cat trapped inside the couch. FML

Today, I had to check up on a 400-pound inmate who was very upset about being locked up. When I got to his cell, he threw one of his own turds at me through the bars. I took a hit. FML

#21214798
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49192) - you deserved it (4080)

On 07/20/2014 at 1:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend wanted to take me out on a date. He doesn't have a car, but he said he'd borrow transport from his neighbor. He showed up at my house on a ride-on lawn mower. FML

#21213104
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47717) - you deserved it (6797)

On 07/18/2014 at 4:21pm - love - by Lisa (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at my grandma's funeral. While giving the eulogy, I accidentally mixed up "You will be missed" and "You won't be forgotten" and instead said "You won't be missed." FML

#21212849
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42406) - you deserved it (6830)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:30pm - misc - by familyhatesme - United States (Washington)

Today, every house in my neighborhood was vandalized. They skipped our house. Everybody thinks it was me. FML

#21209396
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50782) - you deserved it (3648)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:35pm - misc - by chloecamp - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got chewed out by a parent for putting her kid underwater. I teach swim lessons. FML

#21209168
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41307) - you deserved it (3407)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:04pm - work - by AFH2O - United States (California)

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, I went on a date and ate in the park. When I crossed my legs under the table, I scraped my knee and got a lot of splinters in it. When I got back home and started digging out the splinters, my dad furiously demanded to know why I'd been on my knees during the date. FML

#21206411
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44194) - you deserved it (4218)

On 07/11/2014 at 9:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, while sitting on my front porch, my cat came up beside me. I started idly stroking her, only to turn and realize I was petting a wild raccoon. FML

#21206318
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44278) - you deserved it (8282)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:38pm - animals - by and god shat (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50660) - you deserved it (6634)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my fiancée has been saying, "Shit's gone cray-cray" for over a week. I finally snapped. When I was done ranting, she murmured, "Baby, don't be cray-cray". FML

#21204913
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46643) - you deserved it (8160)

On 07/10/2014 at 9:34am - love - by oh my fucking god (woman) - United Kingdom (Derby)



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