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vespergreen

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vespergreen
  • Town/Country : Narnia
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Sunday 24 September 1995 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 323
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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vespergreen's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

See all of vespergreen's badges

vespergreen's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend forced me to do stretching exercises with him before and after sex as a "safety precaution". FML

#20645667
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40273) - you deserved it (6572)

On 05/06/2013 at 3:58pm - intimacy - by stretchy - United States (Maryland)

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

#20643910
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41519) - you deserved it (5326)

On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)

Today, I met my new roommate. She has a life-size cardboard cutout of Justin Bieber in her room, which I've seen her having actual conversations with twice already. I have to share a bedroom with this psycho. FML

#20640984
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46577) - you deserved it (3553)

On 05/04/2013 at 1:46pm - misc - by immovingout (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

#20639737
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52960) - you deserved it (2710)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, I'm on holiday in Ghana. After having worn an anklet I bought here for the past two weeks, I was told that it's used by the local prostitutes to advertise their trade. FML

#20637157
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41368) - you deserved it (6228)

On 05/02/2013 at 3:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, I had a job interview at the local donut shop. It turns out I misunderstood the position, and that the job was actually to wear a donut costume and wave at cars outside the shop. I was told this after I got hired. FML

#20630021
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35644) - you deserved it (7574)

On 04/29/2013 at 9:39am - work - by sdeeter (man) - United States

Today, my dog became scared of his own food bowl. He now barks for ages every time he sees it. FML

#20629727
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31124) - you deserved it (2411)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:20am - animals - by conbon123 - United States (Oregon)

Today, I overheard my boyfriend telling his buddies that the main reason he got into video game modding was so he could put a virtual version of me in his games and "shoot the fuck out of that bitch". FML

#20627653
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43995) - you deserved it (5670)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:32pm - love - by gibbette (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Dubai)

Today, I was trying sell a customer a top-of-the-line surround sound system. Apparently he was aware that I work on commission, as he threatened to buy the system elsewhere unless I sang Rebecca Black's "Friday" in front of the whole store. Goodbye, self-respect. FML

#20610052
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37650) - you deserved it (4430)

On 04/21/2013 at 12:03pm - money - by a little less poor at least (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while my boyfriend was in the kitchen, he got three text messages, all of which were from "Babe 2", "Babe 3", and "Babe 4". FML

#20607010
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49351) - you deserved it (5949)

On 04/20/2013 at 8:02am - love - by How strange - United States

Today, I just remembered that I changed my Gmail display name to "Rice Ball" out of privacy-paranoia a while back. I've been using this same email to apply to several professional jobs. FML

#20592754
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13516) - you deserved it (31640)

On 04/15/2013 at 1:58am - misc - by geeshock1987 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

#20587443
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54556) - you deserved it (9167)

On 04/13/2013 at 1:04am - misc - by ironies a b*tch - United States (Illinois)

Today, I had to get my grandparents out of jail, because they were caught having sex in a public place. They excused their actions by saying that you can only be young and stupid once, so if you continue doing stupid actions, you are still young. FML

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I dropped our daughter. Our hypothetical daughter. Represented by a stuffed owl. FML

#20572997
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40397) - you deserved it (3824)

On 04/03/2013 at 9:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)



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