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venfinch

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venfinch

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 227
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About venfinch : I love music I'm a vegetarian and I don't like the human race :)

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venfinch's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30282) - you deserved it (9732)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to my weekly AA meeting. It was a huge crowd and I was the guest speaker. Not 5 minutes into my speech, I was booed off stage and banned from further attendance because I accidentally wore a Jack Daniel's shirt. FML

#21217633
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17972) - you deserved it (42656)

On 07/22/2014 at 7:20pm - health - by dypshyyt - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

#21216984
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28325) - you deserved it (21528)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:55am - intimacy - by teegtwo (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, I went on a date and ate in the park. When I crossed my legs under the table, I scraped my knee and got a lot of splinters in it. When I got back home and started digging out the splinters, my dad furiously demanded to know why I'd been on my knees during the date. FML

#21206411
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43339) - you deserved it (4185)

On 07/11/2014 at 9:36pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Idaho)

Today, I confided to my boyfriend that I have a condition that causes me to grow thick toe hair. He now won't stop calling me "the sexy Hobbit." FML

#21206358
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39591) - you deserved it (6366)

On 07/11/2014 at 8:26pm - health - by sexyhobbit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48897) - you deserved it (6526)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my coworker called in to say that he couldn't make it to work today because he was in a coma and asked if I could cover his shift. This isn't the first time he's tried to use this excuse. FML

#21203542
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41918) - you deserved it (3367)

On 07/09/2014 at 12:24am - work - by HowAreYouAlive - United States (Virginia)

Today, after a power outage at my house, my 14-year-old brother was genuinely confused as to why our flashlights still worked if we had no electricity. FML

#21200603
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42069) - you deserved it (3918)

On 07/06/2014 at 2:04pm - misc - by idiot bro (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, it's my birthday. My next-door neighbours gave me a stool and some rope. FML

#21194564
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54591) - you deserved it (5146) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 07/01/2014 at 12:55am - love - by NosChersVoisins - France (Aquitaine)

Today, after losing his job, I reassured my boyfriend by telling him I'd rather be with him living in a cardboard box than to be without him. He responded by telling me he'd rather be dead. FML

#21194528
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41661) - you deserved it (5440)

On 07/01/2014 at 12:26am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML

#21193691
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25479) - you deserved it (37626)

On 06/30/2014 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I sped off down the road, then realized to my horror that my cat was clinging to the roof of the car. FML

Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML

#21192954
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39936) - you deserved it (6455)

On 06/29/2014 at 9:05pm - misc - by Unknown - United States

Today, I tried to be seductive to get intimate with my boyfriend. He commented on how sexy I looked, and how badly he wanted me, then asked me to move because I was blocking the TV, and the World Cup match he was watching. FML

#21192852
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40490) - you deserved it (14283)

On 06/29/2014 at 7:14pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)



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