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vanessa9494

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vanessa9494

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 10 November 1994 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1878
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About vanessa9494 : FML

vanessa9494's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 10:38pm<b>boone</b> - the 11/16/2009 at 3:36pm

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vanessa9494's favorite FMLs

Today, I was really depressed so I talked on the phone with my best friend. She was telling me how a guy she really liked complimented her. I told her it was be nice to get at least one compliment. After a long silence she says, "You're really good with computers." FML

#6312385
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25971) - you deserved it (5140)

On 11/15/2009 at 12:55pm - misc - by Ugh (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I thought it would be funny to draw a d*ck on my friend's binder while he was out of the class. While perfecting the drawing I realized the class had gone quiet. Looking up I realised my teacher had been watching me. I had to stand up infront of the class and talk about the drawing. FML

#6278567
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6404) - you deserved it (46743)

On 11/12/2009 at 8:32pm - misc - by MaiB (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my cousin and I were out on the boardwalk. I walked to the railing next to a man and said, "Great view isn't it?" Then I found out that the man was blind and had a seeing eye dog. FML

#5981900
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25119) - you deserved it (9471)

On 10/24/2009 at 10:14pm - animals - by RC (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while shopping for some bananas at my local grocery store, an old woman came up to me and started rubbing my stomach. She simply asked when I was due. I am a 43 year old man with a beer belly. FML

#5978415
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32968) - you deserved it (13521)

On 10/24/2009 at 6:24pm - misc - by fmlifetime (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was taking a bubble bath, and had my iPod touch on the side of my bathtub so I could listen to my music. My dog walked up to the side of the tub, looked me in the eye, and nudged my iPod into the water. FML

#5789992
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12006) - you deserved it (50084)

On 10/12/2009 at 1:36am - animals - by bubbles (woman) - United States

Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML

#5774504
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52908) - you deserved it (26856)

On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)

Today, I went to the doctors and was told I would need an inhaler. My mom came back from the pharmacy and told me the copay of $35 dollars was way too expensive, so she is making me use my cat's old inhaler. My mom values my cat's ability to breathe more then my own. FML

#5627700
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34857) - you deserved it (2153)

On 10/03/2009 at 7:17pm - misc - by juliasaman - United States (Washington)

Today, during an argument with my daughter she screamed "everyone hates you!" and stormed off. I flopped down on the couch in frustration where the cat jumped on my lap. "You love me, don't you?" I asked the cat. She crapped on my leg and went to my daughter's room. FML

#5582438
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36398) - you deserved it (6101)

On 10/01/2009 at 10:25am - animals - by unloved (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was on my computer when the girl that I really like instant-messages me. I went to type back, accidentally pressed control-V, and posted an entire article on how to remove genital warts. FML

#5579268
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13363) - you deserved it (40997)

On 10/01/2009 at 1:58am - health - by Garrett (man) - United States (Oregon) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I learned that "Je suis excité" does not mean "I'm excited" in French. It means "I'm sexually excited"... more or less. I've been doing a lot of exciting things and using it a lot the past two weeks. With my French friends, people I meet, and especially with my host family. FML

#5391347
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31960) - you deserved it (12792)

On 09/21/2009 at 10:26am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Rhone-Alpes)

Today, I got out of the shower to find my cat staring up at me. Apparently my swinging penis looks like a cat toy to her, so she jumped up and clawed and tried to bite it. FML

#5189788
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39888) - you deserved it (6565)

On 09/11/2009 at 4:46pm - animals - by ouchh (man) - United States (California)

Today, I found out why my husband had wanted to wait until marriage to get it on. Last night was the first night of our honeymoon, and he informed me that he wasn't always Ben, but used to be Brenda. His 'penis' doesn't work and he had wanted to know I "truly loved him" before he had let me know. FML

#5148313
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (175500) - you deserved it (18021)

On 09/09/2009 at 1:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my mum grounded me for going to my boyfriend's house instead of the library. She said my boyfriend's mum phoned up because she could hear us having it off in his room. When I denied it my mum shouted at me for being a liar as well as a slut. I did go to the library. FML

#5103491
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76491) - you deserved it (3675)

On 09/07/2009 at 11:39am - love - by SingleGirl (woman) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, I took a look at my boyfriend's videocamera. On it were several videos of me on the toilet. My boyfriend has been hiding the videocamera in the bathroom airvent, and taping me taking dumps for the past three months. FML

#5097909
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70337) - you deserved it (4211)

On 09/07/2009 at 2:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)



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