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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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uebanec

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uebanec
  • Town/Country : USA
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 270
  • Number of comments : 4
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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uebanec's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML

#12953032 (265)

I agree, your life sucks (40659) - you deserved it (5776)

On 09/07/2010 at 7:48pm - kids - by uselessdad - Singapore

Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML

#12851592 (355)

I agree, your life sucks (43552) - you deserved it (3000)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend, who recently started French classes, and I were having sex. Knowing how whispering in my ear turns me on, she whispered something in French, and I came. Later I found out it meant something like, "You should lose a lot of weight." FML

#12776865 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (20693) - you deserved it (6177)

On 08/27/2010 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by gleefan116 (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was in a public restroom with my 4 year old daughter. I took her in the stall with me, and as I was using the restroom she looked down and loudly asked, "Mommy! Why do you have a beard on your peepee?!!" Then I heard everybody in the stalls next to us laughing. FML

#12677495 (286)

I agree, your life sucks (33336) - you deserved it (9131)

On 08/22/2010 at 2:58am - kids - by Bailey - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I took my brother and nieces to the zoo. Two of the lions at the exhibit were mating, so I said, "They're playing leap-frog." My 4-year-old niece said, "Looks like they're fucking to me." FML

#12663575 (279)

I agree, your life sucks (36713) - you deserved it (10619)

On 08/21/2010 at 12:49pm - intimacy - by mc_dreamy - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, all the while my friends were over, my mom took too many of her pills and walked around the house nude. She then bit me. FML

#12624086 (155)

I agree, your life sucks (29847) - you deserved it (2261)

On 08/19/2010 at 11:48am - misc - by feartheend511 - United States (Maryland)

Today, one of my mum's dinner guests walked in on me and my boyfriend kissing, only to let out a horrified scream. Apparently my mum had introduced my boyfriend as her son, as she is embarrassed of my real brother. FML

#12524990 (202)

I agree, your life sucks (28186) - you deserved it (1707)

On 08/14/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by incestastic - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was having it off with my boyfriend. He is the kind of guy that likes to keep things interesting. Just as he started climaxing, he began to meow. FML

#12438405 (169)

I agree, your life sucks (23673) - you deserved it (6190)

On 08/10/2010 at 7:58pm - intimacy - by verno02 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my husband thought it'd be funny to trigger the alarm in the house while I was sleeping. Shocked, I ran outside naked. FML

#12364417 (142)

I agree, your life sucks (27622) - you deserved it (4902)

On 08/07/2010 at 1:21am - love - by Hunterxx (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I discovered that my mom is having an affair... with her cousin. FML

#12322753 (243)

I agree, your life sucks (44283) - you deserved it (2835)

On 08/05/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by Drew - United States (Texas)

Today, my fiancé invited his pregnant co-worker for dinner. After we finished eating, he sat down and explained to me that her kid is his and that he's been cheating on me with her for 5 months. She had a smile on her face during the entire thing. FML

#12284629 (404)

I agree, your life sucks (57573) - you deserved it (2852)

On 08/03/2010 at 8:11am - love - by Broken (woman) - United Arab Emirates (Abu Dhabi)

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390 (386)

I agree, your life sucks (10790) - you deserved it (39957)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after spending a great evening with the guy I really like, he dropped me off outside my house. When he pulled into my driveway, his lights shone onto my drunken mum taking the garbage out in nothing but her black panties. FML

#11636469 (119)

I agree, your life sucks (26348) - you deserved it (1852)

On 07/03/2010 at 2:57pm - misc - by Emily - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my husband left his cell phone at home. I looked through his contacts and found a person named "The Bitch." Being a very curious person, I decided to call "The Bitch" to see who it was. My phone rang. FML

#6192797 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (28633) - you deserved it (10597)

On 11/07/2009 at 5:22am - misc - by badwife (woman) - Japan

Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML

#4679110 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (35429) - you deserved it (99709)

On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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