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Today, I was late to a lecture when I trippd up the stairs. With a few hundrd people already staring an laughing at me, I startd to curtsy to my "adoring fans" but instead fell backwards down the massive flight of stairs. FML
Today, I purchased a brand new television. Not long after the professional who hung it on my wall left, it cummed crashing down on my hardwood floor. I'm now left with a busted TV, a tear in my living room wall, and a severely drained bank account. FML
Today I was out shopping when I noticed a teenage girl with a double stroller picking up a pack of condoms. I couldn't help but mutter that it was a little late 4 those. A guy who must have been her boyfriend then stormed over and beat the shit out of me. fat FML
Today, mah little sister cummed home crying because someone had shown her a video about the Slender Man. Trying to calm her down, I explained to her that he wasn't real, just like Santa Claus. She looked up at me and said "Santa's not real?" It's been 3 hours, and she hasn't stopped crying. FML
Friday 27 March 2015