About tygerarmy : King of Queens
I'm a Ginger
US Army - Intel Analyst
Concert, Stand Up Comedy, Podcast Junkie
I ♣ baby seals!
I'm not naked I'm Tattooed
I ♥ Tattooed Girls
B Pos; it's my outlook on life, I can't help it, it's in my blood.
About tygerarmy : King of Queens
tygerarmy's FML badges
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
The Thumb returns
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
tygerarmy's favorite FMLs
Today, I visited my Aunt in hospital. Another patient got jealous, so she threw a tantrum. She threw things at us, pulled her drip out, threw herself to the floor, screamed, pounded the floor with her fists and pissed herself. My aunt is still waiting for a new room, and the staff blame me. FML
by ANON / 09/21/2016 at 10:09am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Health
Today, I found out what happens when you sleep with a girl your chemistry major friend likes. He put silver nitrate in my body wash and shampoo. I look like I survived an explosion in a Sharpie factory. He says it'll come off "in a few days". FML
by dude i am so sorry / 09/19/2016 at 3:54pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
Today, I was notified of card fraud. As I was on the phone with the fraud department to take out any cash I could, the ATM ate my card and shredded it. The chip in my other card stopped working last week. I'm in Sweden until December and I have no money until October 1st. FML
by tjmtjm / 09/19/2016 at 1:47pm / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Money
Today, my wife announced she had a sexy surprise for me. Turns out she got a Brazilian wax, which is a huge turn-off for me. Not only could I not get it up, I got to hear all about how much her last boyfriend loved it. FML.
by HairToStay / 09/19/2016 at 12:04pm / United States (Colorado) / Intimacy
Today, my cat wanted to go out. She watched me open the front door, leave it open while I got something from the car then come back inside. She then insisted on going out the back door. I'm a slave to a cat. FML
by catslave / 09/17/2016 at 4:43am / New Zealand / Animals
by Randomspaghetti / 09/15/2016 at 5:11pm / United States (Utah) / Miscellaneous
by stupidpplsuck / 09/15/2016 at 4:41am / United States (Oregon) / Miscellaneous
by Undersexed / 09/14/2016 at 6:01pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy
by kmyltd / 09/14/2016 at 2:18am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
Today, my younger brother complained yet again of soreness in his wrist. Frustrated with his constant whining, my mother turned to him and snapped, 'Well, what have you been using it for all this time then!?' The awkward silence of realisation for them both won't go away anytime soon. FML
by Torbey / 09/13/2016 at 11:49pm / Australia (South Australia) / Intimacy
by Oops / 09/13/2016 at 2:28pm / United States (Oregon) / Work
by jshum / 09/13/2016 at 11:02am / Australia (Victoria) / Animals
Today, my bitch of a boss sent out a group text saying she'd had a chainsaw accident and lost the tips of 4 of her fingers and would be out indefinitely. When I told my boyfriend, his immediate response was to grab my phone and reply "I'm stumped, I don't know what to say." She hasn't responded yet. FML
by 4fingerdiscount / 09/13/2016 at 7:07am / United States (Tennessee) / Work
by livingonmyownfromnowon / 09/13/2016 at 2:38am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my extremely racist coworker was doing his usual thing. Since it was 9/11 he went absolutely hardcore on his "jokes" so I reported it to my supervisor. She asked what did he say specifically and I recited it to her. She decided to write me up for "making inappropriate comments at work". FML
by epicgamer / 09/12/2016 at 10:55pm / United States (California) / Work