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tygerarmy

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tygerarmy

22Liked!

tygerarmytygerarmy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 September 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11306
  • Number of comments : 658
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About tygerarmy : King of Queens
I'm a Ginger
US Army - Intel Analyst
Concert, Stand Up Comedy, Podcast Junkie
I ♣ baby seals!
I'm not naked I'm Tattooed
I ♥ Tattooed Girls
B Pos; it's my outlook on life, I can't help it, it's in my blood.
Twitter/IG @TygerArmy

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tygerarmy's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of tygerarmy's badges

tygerarmy's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while giving me head. FML

#19335521
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26043) - you deserved it (5412)

On 03/23/2012 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by justgreat - United States (Florida)

Today, I overheard a girl and a guy sitting behind me on the bus who were talking about Skyrim, one of my favourite games. After a while, I turned around and, as a fellow gamer, thanked them for restoring my faith in humanity. They went very quiet. I'm now that weird guy on the bus. FML

#19324858
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9551) - you deserved it (32629)

On 03/22/2012 at 2:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was sitting in my school's crowded auditorium. When our single, abstinence-only ballsack of a Sex Ed teacher was announced to be stepping down due to being pregnant, I burst into uncontrollable laughter. My reward was aching sides and a week of detention. FML

#19285131
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26964) - you deserved it (6893)

On 03/15/2012 at 9:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my husband sat me down on the couch so he could share some "awesome" news with me. He excitedly declared that he and his idiot drinking buddies are planning on running a real-life Fight Club out of our basement. FML

#19247748
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23717) - you deserved it (2880)

On 03/09/2012 at 9:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML

#19245135
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10332) - you deserved it (33112)

On 03/09/2012 at 11:55am - misc - by h4rdy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my history teacher confiscated my iPhone. She dropped it on the way back to her desk, and I now have a shattered iPhone screen to fix. FML

#19233379
432 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27261) - you deserved it (28145)

On 03/07/2012 at 2:25pm - misc - by sad face - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling frisky for the first time in months, so I started feeling up my husband. He kept insisting he had a headache and that he wasn't feeling it tonight. When I noticed his sarcasm, he said "Yeah, doesn't feel so great, does it?" and turned the TV volume up. FML

#19156948
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10437) - you deserved it (55258)

On 02/24/2012 at 10:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend said I could only take her virginity while I have a flaccid penis, so I won't hurt her. I get hard from just staring at her covered ass. FML

#19131405
411 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40017) - you deserved it (5845)

On 02/21/2012 at 2:17pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I overheard my fourteen year old daughter talking on the phone. Apparently, as of last night, she and her best friend have their "official licenses in muff diving". FML

#19124149
382 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26404) - you deserved it (4072)

On 02/20/2012 at 4:19pm - intimacy - by Gavin - United Kingdom (Nottinghamshire)

Today, I went out on a first date. He insisted we go to McDonald's and split a Happy Meal because he "didn't want to waste any money on a first date." FML

#19098700
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31310) - you deserved it (4092)

On 02/17/2012 at 4:44am - love - by Cheap N Happy (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

#19095316
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27238) - you deserved it (5063)

On 02/16/2012 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by dummy - United States

Today, after a twelve week dry spell followed by an eight week one, I decided to take a bit more initiative at seducing my girlfriend. Not only was she "not in the mood" again, but she offered me Trident Layers gum instead. She apparently thought that it was a fair trade. FML

#18996569
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25446) - you deserved it (4820)

On 02/04/2012 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by dasnich (man) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I finally got my stubborn toddler to take an afternoon nap after an hour and a half of wrestling with her. Ten minutes later, a UPS package arrived at my door. The UPS man decided it would be a good idea to ring my doorbell repeatedly in rapid-fire sequence as he was walking away. FML

#18974357
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24836) - you deserved it (2451)

On 02/02/2012 at 2:07am - kids - by Insomniac (woman) - United States

Today, I was sitting on a bus. I'm deaf. An old lady looked very angry at me and started talking. Then she looked like she was screaming. I had to type on my phone that I'm deaf. Apparently, I'd been stepping on her foot. She decided to poke me in the eye and type, "Now you're blind too." FML

#18936748
209 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38510) - you deserved it (2964)

On 01/28/2012 at 7:46pm - misc - by Come on - United States

Today, I admitted my fear of small spaces to my boyfriend. His response was to immediately lock me in the hall closet. FML

#18918439
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25974) - you deserved it (4197)

On 01/26/2012 at 6:50pm - health - by Bailyboo (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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