About tygerarmy : King of Queens
I'm a Ginger
US Army - Intel Analyst
Concert, Stand Up Comedy, Podcast Junkie
I ♣ baby seals!
I'm not naked I'm Tattooed
I ♥ Tattooed Girls
B Pos; it's my outlook on life, I can't help it, it's in my blood.
About tygerarmy : King of Queens
tygerarmy's FML badges
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
The Thumb returns
You have thumbed 5000 comments.
tygerarmy's favorite FMLs
Today, while hanging out with this guy I'm interested in, we turned and made eye contact. We were face to face and I thought he was finally going to kiss me. He decided to lick my face from chin to forehead instead. FML
by qyx3lmnop24 / 12/20/2014 at 2:33am / United States (California) / Love
by I warned him / 12/18/2014 at 9:39pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML
by Heyjai / 12/16/2014 at 9:31am / United States (New Jersey) / Health
Today, my boss threw a pre-Christmas party at work. He always uses them to rant at us and tell us to be better employees. When the speech began, the alarm I have set for my daily birth control went off. It's the sound of an obnoxious screaming child. FML
by driven_crazy / 12/12/2014 at 2:52pm / United States (New Jersey) / Work
by jesspacheco27 / 12/12/2014 at 12:52am / United States (California) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 12/04/2014 at 2:33pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 12/02/2014 at 12:39pm / United States (Arizona) / Love
by Anonymous / 12/01/2014 at 12:55pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/30/2014 at 8:07am / United States (New Jersey) / Intimacy
Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML
by Anonymous / 11/26/2014 at 2:41pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I started to get horny while watching TV with my husband. I tried turning him on by telling him I wanted his cock. He cheerfully replied without looking away from the TV, "If only I gave a fuck, babe, if only I gave a fuck!" FML
by 404: fuck not given / 11/23/2014 at 11:34am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
by jigglypluff / 11/19/2014 at 12:27am / United States (Nebraska) / Intimacy
by omgdesdes / 11/15/2014 at 8:29pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
Today, I have an Army fitness test. I was worried I'd cramp up during the last mile of the run, so I drank a large amount of water in preparation. I later woke up in the very small barracks that I share with three other people, soaking in a puddle of my own piss. FML
by UH60 / 11/15/2014 at 5:58pm / Kuwait (Al Kuwayt) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/13/2014 at 9:14pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals
- Today, I gave my husband an early Christmas present: Santa-themed lingerie. He got angry and called… Today, my girlfriend was going down on me. She only did it for 30 seconds, stopped, then said, "I'm… Today, I tried to have sex with my boyfriend three times, but every time he insisted that he wasn't…