Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tygerarmy

Online | Search for a member

tygerarmy

22Liked!

tygerarmytygerarmy
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 September 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 11335
  • Number of comments : 658
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 17 posted

About tygerarmy : King of Queens
I'm a Ginger
US Army - Intel Analyst
Concert, Stand Up Comedy, Podcast Junkie
I ♣ baby seals!
I'm not naked I'm Tattooed
I ♥ Tattooed Girls
B Pos; it's my outlook on life, I can't help it, it's in my blood.
Twitter/IG @TygerArmy

tygerarmy's page activity

Visits<b>unknownsilver</b> - 10 hours ago<b>joejoe1415</b> - 21 hours ago<b>michaelm1290</b> - yesterday at 7:33pm<b>brytonhansen</b> - yesterday at 3:01pm<b>birdybirdchirp</b> - yesterday at 11:47am<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 1:27am<b>whelp777</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 1:20am<b>marythecat333</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:39am<b>Allornone</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 12:31am<b>sethsmith11</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:58pm<b>peachbutt</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 10:49pm<b>GGregoire</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:44pm<b>watermelon1</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 5:53pm<b>lizziemarie2468</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 11:07am<b>russfml</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 8:35am<b>jcshadow</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 7:14pm<b>gshocker20</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 5:48pm<b>Nolimit2217</b> - the 02/27/2015 at 5:11pm

Liked!<b>whelp777</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 7:34am<b>jcshadow</b> - the 02/28/2015 at 1:15am<b>pait_loves_shane</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 1:49am<b>Sansa</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 6:50pm<b>Christine_Junmin</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 5:58pm<b>marythecat333</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 3:42am<b>TheJm4jEst1c</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 2:46am<b>cottoncandylips</b> - the 02/17/2015 at 7:14am<b>cre8tvlylicnsd</b> - the 02/11/2015 at 12:08am<b>OhWhoCares</b> - the 02/09/2015 at 8:06pm<b>insanecutie</b> - the 02/04/2015 at 2:26pm<b>heroforhirex95</b> - the 01/16/2015 at 8:31am<b>xwingtwo</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 11:47am<b>RoseWithThorns</b> - the 01/10/2015 at 10:12am<b>sarah5745</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 8:08pm<b>kaycrazyy</b> - the 01/02/2015 at 3:32am<b>lilbutton3</b> - the 12/25/2014 at 9:06am<b>Auribahl</b> - the 12/24/2014 at 3:47am

tygerarmy's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of tygerarmy's badges

tygerarmy's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try some "prolonging gel" to help him last longer between the sheets. Surprisingly, it worked, and he lasted 3 times longer than usual. I can now enjoy 4 whole minutes of sex. FML

#20452996
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45382) - you deserved it (5989)

On 01/11/2013 at 12:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I got into an accident on my motorcycle. When I told my wife that the doctor said I couldn't have sex for two weeks, she couldn't contain her joy. FML

#20447288
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42251) - you deserved it (8106)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I went out to meet a wonderful woman I'd chatted with online. I did have a few fears about if she was really just some guy trying to make a fool out of me. When I met her, she really was a girl, and was happy to see me. Problem: she was actually 13. I'm 34. FML

#20444863
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26605) - you deserved it (8043)

On 01/06/2013 at 12:24pm - love - by lifsabtch (man) -

Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML

#20444730
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27770) - you deserved it (3534)

On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I had to download a parental block so my dad would stop watching porn on my laptop. FML

#20441386
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27975) - you deserved it (1981)

On 01/03/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Tooyoungforthis (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML

#20435818
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40425) - you deserved it (13578)

On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I woke up to find my boyfriend using my hand to wank. FML

#20427495
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46684) - you deserved it (9670)

On 12/28/2012 at 6:40am - intimacy - by kmtranter - United Kingdom (Brent)

Today, my cat had the greatest idea ever: hide inside our Christmas tree and attack anyone who walks past. It would have come as extremely funny to me if I hadn't been her first victim. FML

#20425350
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30435) - you deserved it (7695)

On 12/27/2012 at 5:16am - animals - by DarkDisaster (woman) - United States

Today, I gave my girlfriend an orgasm. It was great until mid-gasm when she swung her arm out and knocked me out. She still can't stop laughing. FML

#20418972
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40013) - you deserved it (5775)

On 12/24/2012 at 2:44pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, at the gas station, the automatic door didn't open when I approached it. I asked the cashier to open it for me, joking that because I'm a redhead, I didn't have a soul and it wouldn't open for me. The cashier freaked and wouldn't let me go until I proved I had a soul. FML

#20199980
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25777) - you deserved it (5178)

On 12/11/2012 at 1:07am - misc - by Devil (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, a lady on the bus came up to me and asked if she could sit down. Thinking she meant the seat next to me, I said sure. She meant my lap. FML

#20198778
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22529) - you deserved it (1907)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:13am - misc - by LLCK - United States (Minnesota)

Today, a lady on the bus came up to me and asked if she could sit down. Thinking she meant the seat next to me, I said sure. She meant my lap. FML

#20198778
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22529) - you deserved it (1907)

On 12/10/2012 at 5:13am - misc - by LLCK - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I came home to find all of the wood in my house either broken or gone. On the now legless table there was a note from my mother, saying that she needed the wood to build a boat, and that I will thank her when the world ends. FML

#20197527
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27298) - you deserved it (1574)

On 12/09/2012 at 10:29am - misc - by woodless (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my mom bitched me out and threatened to send me to a Bible camp, after catching me admiring a photo of a bikini model, which is apparently "immoral behavior." This is the same woman who cheated on my dad twice, justifying it by claiming the devil tempted her. FML

#20195064
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35530) - you deserved it (1965)

On 12/07/2012 at 12:06pm - misc - by sonofahypocriticalwhore (man) - United States



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: