About twye : "See, the problem isn't that life is so short. It's the fact that death is so much longer. "
I use the App, not the website. Email me instead of PMing me.
Naggapoo@gmail.com
App. Y U take foreva to load?! ;w;
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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Today, I realized my girlfriend makes the same exact noises in bed and when she eats. I don't know if I'm a really good cook or a really bad lover. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19531) - you deserved it (2277)
On 01/06/2013 at 8:06am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)
Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13905) - you deserved it (5872)
On 01/04/2013 at 11:59am - kids - by Raela (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend called me anti-social. To prove him wrong I texted one of my friends. She texted back, "Who's this??" FML
I agree, your life sucks (15080) - you deserved it (6401)
On 01/04/2013 at 1:18am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19287) - you deserved it (4100)
On 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm - health - by WellShit (man) - United States (Minnesota)
Today, I had to download a parental block so my dad would stop watching porn on my laptop. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20582) - you deserved it (991)
On 01/03/2013 at 7:34pm - misc - by Tooyoungforthis (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, someone sent my boss a CD full of documents for an upcoming trial. It's my job to sort through the evidence, so he gave it to me. I looked on the CD. There's only one file; a 1020-page PDF of all the documents we need, and the pages weren't scanned in order. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23511) - you deserved it (1215)
On 01/03/2013 at 6:36pm - work - by fucked five ways to friday (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, my mom asked me why MS Word keeps underlining some words. After I tried to convince her that you're supposed to put a space after commas, she started yelling at me for making her look stupid. I can never win. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18838) - you deserved it (1233)
Today, while talking to one of my parents' friends, we discovered that the house he grew up in is the same house my boyfriend now lives in. When he recalled that he lost his first tooth there, the only response I could come up with was, "Oh my gosh, I lost my virginity there!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (9353) - you deserved it (35038)
On 01/03/2013 at 5:34am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend of four years broke up with me by writing on my bathroom mirror in Sharpie. What did he write? "Hi, I'm Emily. I'm fat, ugly, and now single." FML
I agree, your life sucks (42792) - you deserved it (2903)
On 01/03/2013 at 1:42am - love - by Emily (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29390) - you deserved it (6433)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I got fired from my job because I "look too grumpy." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23878) - you deserved it (7072)
On 01/02/2013 at 2:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I can hear my flatmate masturbating loudly and asking himself if he likes it. And replying. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42051) - you deserved it (3121)
On 01/01/2013 at 10:20am - intimacy - by ashbeat - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33558) - you deserved it (9856)
On 01/01/2013 at 5:30am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)
Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32291) - you deserved it (2704)
On 12/31/2012 at 5:36pm - work - by shattysituation - United States
Today, while buying paint, I began to help an elderly woman working to lift some heavy boxes. She told me what a nice young lady I was. Then her boss came over, screamed at her for being lazy and fired her. She cried. So did I. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39101) - you deserved it (2495)
On 12/31/2012 at 10:44am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Nova Scotia)
Friday 24 May 2013
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