tvirusapocalypse

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tvirusapocalypse

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 September 1997 (18 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 163
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About tvirusapocalypse : that girl everyone forgets...

tvirusapocalypse's page activity

Visits<b>bellles</b> - the 01/15/2014 at 12:10am<b>fmlgazer</b> - the 12/10/2013 at 3:00am

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tvirusapocalypse's favorite FMLs

Today, I came home from a night out with the lads. My girlfriend refused to make love to me, saying my sperm were drunk and would raise hell in her uterus. FML

by vegas-81 / 02/09/2014 at 10:39pm / France / Intimacy

Today, something ran across my foot while I was on the toilet. Hearing me scream, my husband ran in. We now have a new "pet" mouse named Jerry that I am not allowed to kill under threat of divorce. FML

by ZombiexIce / 02/09/2014 at 10:22pm / United States (California) / Animals

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I had to explain to my husband why saving the condom from the first time we had sex is not romantic. FML

by O_o / 02/08/2014 at 7:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I used my vaporiser to make my house smell like lavender while I went to work. My brother thought it would be funny to pee inside it. My whole house now smells like pissy lavender. FML

by lavenderpiss / 12/15/2013 at 9:04pm / Australia (South Australia) / Kids

Today, I came across a tourist in the street asking people for directions, but nobody understood him. I speak English, so I went to help the gentleman out. He said "Knock it off with the cheesy accent, pal" and informed me that my country is a shithole. FML

by thank u usa / 12/13/2013 at 5:20pm / Germany / Miscellaneous

Today, my grandkids went around my house claiming items to inherit. FML

by blah! / 12/08/2013 at 8:19am / United States (Connecticut) / Kids

Today, my fifteen year old son decided to tell his little five year old sister that Santa isn't real. She now refuses to talk to any of us and thinks "her whole life is a lie". FML

by Anonymous / 12/07/2013 at 2:17am / United States (California) / Work

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2013 at 4:37pm / United States (New Mexico) / Intimacy

Today, I had to explain to my daughter that just because it says non-toxic on the crayons, it doesn't mean that you should eat them. She's 16. FML

by no she wasn't high / 12/01/2013 at 9:50pm / United States (Texas) / Kids

Today, my mom visited. While she was using the bathroom, my man-child of a husband thought it would be funny to knock on the bathroom door with his penis, thinking it was me in there. She opened the door to find him standing there doing the "helicopter". FML

by LadyLola / 11/25/2013 at 12:22am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he had ever cheated on me. In the most sincere and honest tone, he said "if I ever have or ever will, there's no way you would ever find out. I love you too much to lose you", and gave me a hug. FML

by spockswifey / 11/03/2010 at 2:40am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I came home and saw on our fridge, "Please don't drink anymore, I really worry about your health" written by my 7-year-old daughter. I figured she wouldn't ever find out, so I opened the fridge. But I found another note on a can that said "So you're going to drink anyway?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Florida) / Kids

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML

by caroline / 02/06/2009 at 10:29am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy