About trismagestus : I'm a web desinger from Wellington, NZ.
trismagestus's FML badges
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.
Checking you out
You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
trismagestus's favorite FMLs
Today, my husband declined a $100k/year job due to him thinking that a full time job at one work place would be too 'depressing'. I'm a nurse and have to wipe other people's arses for a living, then come home to this lazy dick. FML
by Lauren / 08/09/2011 at 9:48am / Australia (South Australia) / Work
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 5:34pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/05/2011 at 4:25pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was taking a dump behind a dumpster. I suddenly heard a noise and a vibration against the dumpster. It was a garbage truck lifting it to collect the trash. The garbage men started laughing and took out their phones. FML
by jshi8 / 08/04/2011 at 10:35am / United States (Maryland) / Miscellaneous
by ohcrap / 08/02/2011 at 12:58am / United States (Colorado) / Kids
by ewww / 07/30/2011 at 10:07am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by anonymous / 07/28/2011 at 1:39am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
by Anonymous / 07/16/2011 at 7:09pm / United States / Transportation
by shit / 07/07/2011 at 3:43am / United States / Kids
Today, I had to tell my best friend that I couldn't make it to the lake today or tomorrow because I'd been called in to work. She won't believe me and thinks I'm simply avoiding her. I got called in to bathe and clean dogs' anal glands. FML
by xXx3mi_MuffinxXx / 07/01/2011 at 3:23pm / United States (Indiana) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 06/28/2011 at 4:40pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
by anonymous / 06/23/2011 at 10:19am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I was holding my drunken friend's hair while she threw up in the toilet at a party. She said, crying, "Y'don't have to do this..." I told her that that's what friends are for. She replied, "Yeah, but I did sleep with your boyfriend..." FML
by Inconnu / 06/18/2011 at 1:13am / France / Miscellaneous
Today, at work, a customer went to try on a pair of pants. A few minutes later, she hurriedly returned and put the pants back on the shelf without saying anything. I later found out she'd come down with a bout of diarrhea and apparently didn't want to pay for the dry-cleaning. Glamorous. FML
by n77 / 04/22/2011 at 10:17pm / Switzerland (Vaud) / Health
Today, I took my first Viagra. It worked great, but "Wally, the one-eyed wonder-weasel" would not return to "hiding". After 4 hours, I was in mortal aching pain, and went to my doctor for a shot and sedative. My wife, the doctor, and the nurse could not stifle their laughter. FML
by ItsFunnyNow / 10/22/2009 at 12:07am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy