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travisphy

Offline (the 06/27/2015 at 1:19am) | Search for a member

travisphy

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 629
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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travisphy's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of travisphy's badges

travisphy's favorite FMLs

Today, my friend bet everyone at my lunch table that no one could catch the fly that was flying around our table. I reached up and caught it. It was a wasp, and it stung me. FML

#10752650
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14788) - you deserved it (33942)

On 05/25/2010 at 8:32am - health - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up in pajamas I have never seen before. Usually, I sleep naked, and I live alone in a locked apartment. Then, the elderly woman next door asked for her nightgown back. Apparently, I sleep-walked and knocked on all the doors in my hallway repeatedly. I'm moving. FML

#9037500
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27787) - you deserved it (3844)

On 03/13/2010 at 12:27am - misc - by nerdygirl101 (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188
402 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46446) - you deserved it (10136)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

#7598826
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13378) - you deserved it (27990)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I fell asleep after finishing my exam. I had a dream I was falling and woke up smashing my face on the desk. Everyone laughed. FML

#7459742
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24202) - you deserved it (8071)

On 01/20/2010 at 6:19pm - health - by M_Kclift1994 (woman) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, my friend decided to pants me in the middle of the mall. I wasn't wearing underwear. FML

#7400225
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18842) - you deserved it (30797)

On 01/17/2010 at 2:59pm - misc - by Jac (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up in my boyfriend's dorm and decided to take a shower before he woke up. I used the girls bathroom on the above floor, and afterwards just threw on a towel and ran to the elevator. I forgot to press my boyfriend's floor and I was taken to the lobby in a towel. People were waiting. FML

#7344260
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7044) - you deserved it (29682)

On 01/14/2010 at 7:43pm - misc - by nude (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I met my boyfriend's notoriously difficult mother. I had been looking forward to meeting her and making a good impression. Unfortunately, I could not greet her as her son's penis was still in my mouth. FML

#7318001
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29321) - you deserved it (14802)

On 01/13/2010 at 11:42am - intimacy - by pleasedtomeetyou (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house. We decided to have sex in her basement. All awesome, until her mom walked down and wanted to watch a movie with us. I had to watch it naked under a blanket. FML

#7144399
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19680) - you deserved it (7083)

On 01/04/2010 at 10:49am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend in my room. About two minutes into it, my cat walks in and jumps on the bed with us. Without hesitation, my girlfriend tells me to stop, rolls over, and starts petting my cat. FML

#6779540
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29976) - you deserved it (6113)

On 12/16/2009 at 3:53pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML

#6712676
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13400) - you deserved it (39533)

On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, a repairman woke me up so he could change the filter in my furnace. This would have been fine, except he didn't wake me up until he was already in my room, where I was sleeping naked. FML

#6701307
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26806) - you deserved it (4267)

On 12/10/2009 at 10:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML

#6265559
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33154) - you deserved it (4760)

On 11/11/2009 at 10:05pm - misc - by DangerZone (man) - United States (California)

Today, I went to my cousin's farm with my family. First I was pooped on by a goose, peed on by a puppy, bit in the face by the mother dog, fell through the floor of the barn loft, and without knowing it was electric, rested my hand on the horse fence. FML

#5529858
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42770) - you deserved it (8881)

On 09/28/2009 at 4:36pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs, I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex and afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd had great sex also. FML

#4879215
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64316) - you deserved it (4879)

On 08/28/2009 at 7:43am - intimacy - by Phoellie (woman) - United Kingdom (London)



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