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travisphy

Offline (the 06/27/2015 at 1:19am) | Search for a member

travisphy

0Fucked!

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  • Number of visits : 620
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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travisphy's FML badges

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of travisphy's badges

travisphy's favorite FMLs

Today, I was lying on my bed with my boyfriend. I didn't really want to have sex so I told him I would if he really wanted too, but I wouldn't enjoy it. He then started to undo my pants. FML

#12931199
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13634) - you deserved it (52048)

On 09/06/2010 at 8:50am - intimacy - by sad-sexed (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up from a dream in which I had a penis. Apparently I talk in my sleep, because my boyfriend kept staring at my crotch. FML

#12915850
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31668) - you deserved it (4714)

On 09/05/2010 at 10:20am - intimacy - by urgg (woman) - United States

Today, I was applying Icy Hot. I squeezed the bottle too hard making it squirt in my eye. I ran to the bathroom in agony, turned on the faucet, and slammed my face right into it. FML

#12887269
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29404) - you deserved it (6462)

On 09/03/2010 at 3:59pm - health - by Jesska (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend of 2 months decided to wrestle with my younger brother. He has gotten more action than I have. FML

#12881965
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26969) - you deserved it (6830)

On 09/03/2010 at 4:30am - love - by lonleystoner91 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that there is literally a giant hole in my son's bedroom because my son wanted to build a "secret entrance." FML

#12879183
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31716) - you deserved it (4607)

On 09/03/2010 at 12:35am - kids - by Devon - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I decided to drive my mothers Bentley. She is out of town and told me not to go near the car. Being 17, I didn't listen. As I was backing out the driveway, I was hit by an SUV, seriously damaging my moms car. Who was driving the SUV? My mom, coming home early. FML

#12878777
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10858) - you deserved it (73909)

On 09/03/2010 at 12:13am - misc - by ohseven6421 - United States (California)

Today, I learned that my apartment's walls are thin enough for my neighbors to hear my vibrator. I've lived in this apartment for three years. I've been single and horny for all of them. FML

#12872328
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28657) - you deserved it (13047)

On 09/02/2010 at 5:09pm - intimacy - by Buzzie (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I'm recovering from abdominal surgery. In addition to pain, I'm having trouble peeing and haven't pooped since Sunday, so my surgeon prescribed a laxative. Turns out I'm allergic to it. Now I'm covered in hives, even in my ears, incisions, and lady parts. I also still haven't pooped. FML

#12866112
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37269) - you deserved it (2543)

On 09/02/2010 at 3:25am - health - by coyote - Japan

Today, I found out that whenever my best friend used to say she wanted to do my dad, she wasn't kidding. She accomplished her mission in my bed after school. FML

#12851592
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55705) - you deserved it (4376)

On 09/01/2010 at 7:10am - intimacy - by fmlskank93 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked in on my mom's boyfriend jacking off. The worst part was that he didn't stop. FML

#12849732
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39148) - you deserved it (4042)

On 09/01/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Jill Shanks - United States

Today, after my husband's phone buzzed like crazy all morning, I decided to pick it up and see what all the fuss was about. He had three new picture messages from his "boss", naked and strapped to a chair with the caption, "Are you still coming over tonight?" We've been married for nine years and have two children. FML

#12838933
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61842) - you deserved it (4339)

On 08/31/2010 at 2:07pm - intimacy - by ashlee (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took pictures of myself and my girlfriend doing naughty things together on my camera. My mom later asked me if she could borrow the camera for the weekend. Without thinking, I gave her the camera. FML

#12836221
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12210) - you deserved it (51198)

On 08/31/2010 at 9:13am - intimacy - by weezel (man) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML

#12337328
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25042) - you deserved it (39688)

On 08/05/2010 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by JDLAX1924 - United States

Today, my dad found my "list". 32 guys, 4 girls. Colour coded as to who I would sleep with again and who I wouldn't, who were virgins, etc. He complimented me on my "organizational skills." FML

#11944390
336 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14776) - you deserved it (55056)

On 07/17/2010 at 3:34pm - intimacy - by reckless (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I put the vacuum cleaner hose against my neck to give me a hickey, so that it would look like I got some action. FML

#11859279
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26008) - you deserved it (42683)

On 07/13/2010 at 8:33pm - intimacy - by allalone - United States (Georgia)



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