Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

toorudett

Offline (the 06/22/2015 at 1:36am) | Search for a member

toorudett

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 13 July 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2777
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About toorudett : Life is what you make it...

toorudett's page activity

Visits<b>danial1214</b> - the 06/29/2015 at 4:03am<b>Devyn333</b> - the 06/28/2015 at 2:27am<b>greaterdane</b> - the 06/21/2015 at 3:06pm<b>sandraaa03111217</b> - the 06/18/2015 at 5:05am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 11:43pm<b>denaeb123</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 12:23am<b>phatdaddy62</b> - the 07/13/2013 at 3:24pm<b>heer4ranjha</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 2:04am<b>Welshite</b> - the 06/11/2013 at 10:06am<b>gary3768</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 9:02pm<b>sirhomer</b> - the 05/29/2013 at 4:12pm<b>waffule365</b> - the 05/05/2013 at 11:41am<b>klaralynn</b> - the 05/04/2013 at 10:47pm<b>HowieDoIt</b> - the 04/18/2013 at 12:44am<b>1deep4life</b> - the 04/16/2013 at 1:18pm<b>Covenant74</b> - the 04/12/2013 at 8:46pm<b>rayray7066</b> - the 04/05/2013 at 9:54pm<b>MakinMills</b> - the 03/26/2013 at 12:34pm

toorudett's FML badges

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of toorudett's badges

toorudett's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. She was on top, and then stopped, got off, and said, "Let's go get ice cream." I think this was her way of telling me I suck at sex. FML

#21199096
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51477) - you deserved it (10617)

On 07/05/2014 at 12:26am - intimacy - by bad in the sack - United States

Today, my teenage daughter faked a suicide because I bought her a Samsung instead of an iPhone for her birthday. FML

#21198840
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55532) - you deserved it (11390)

On 07/04/2014 at 8:15pm - kids - by iphonerevolution - South Africa

Today, the deranged idiot that I am defending in court went completely nuts and told the judge that I am the guy who planned the whole armed robbery that he is on trial for. FML

#21198798
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49364) - you deserved it (4488)

On 07/04/2014 at 7:17pm - work - by zl5 (man) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my 11-year-old son and I took an IQ test for a laugh. To be honest, I've often suspected that I may have some form of mental retardation, but I didn't expect to get a score of 79, while he got one of 114. FML

#21198731
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41690) - you deserved it (6709)

On 07/04/2014 at 6:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, a guy told me that I look like Angelina Jolie. Before I could thank him, he continued, "I mean like in the chest area. After the mastectomy, you know?" FML

#21198697
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37356) - you deserved it (3332)

On 07/04/2014 at 5:30pm - misc - by fleatitting fame (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I hit rock bottom; I watched one of those shitty infomercial channels, without even being forced into it at gunpoint. Even worse is that I practically creamed myself over a damn fruit juicer, all because it was 50% off and I could actually afford it. FML

#21198655
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32187) - you deserved it (6481)

On 07/04/2014 at 4:29pm - money - by The Rock's arse (woman) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, my little sister started freaking out, because she was playing with some white-out eraser and got some on her finger. She started crying inconsolably because she thought her entire finger was going to disappear. FML

#21198613
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39091) - you deserved it (4137)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:41pm - kids - by neryc (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, on my first day as a lifeguard, a man had a heart attack in the pool. I jumped in, pulled him out, and even went to the hospital with him. He seemed genuinely offended, saying "You should've let me die." FML

#21198585
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44786) - you deserved it (3127)

On 07/04/2014 at 3:04pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, I was at the gym, when I saw my uncle at the front desk. I quietly went up behind him and slapped him hard on the back while yelling "What's up, loser?!" He turned around. It wasn't my uncle. FML

#21198479
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25379) - you deserved it (38754)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:35pm - misc - by Oops - United States

Today, I was reviewing documents at work, only to find one of my coworkers has been signing off on paperwork, claiming he's been walking one of the residents daily. Aside from being a double leg amputee, the patient died two weeks ago. The state review board comes this week. FML

#21198473
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37233) - you deserved it (3591)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by cakefete2 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I parked my motorcycle in a parking spot. When I came back, my bike had been moved and was laying on its side with a note saying, "Sorry I dropped your motorcycle I was trying to move it forward so I could park my car because there weren't any other spots." FML

#21197788
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50598) - you deserved it (6401)

On 07/03/2014 at 9:30pm - misc - by AJL - United States

Today, I found a wasp in my kitchen, so I opened the back door and left the room for 10 minutes in the hope that it would fly away. Upon returning, I found that there were now three wasps, a vicious cat and a very panicked pigeon crashing around the room. FML

#21197738
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43023) - you deserved it (17997)

On 07/03/2014 at 8:27pm - animals - by Snow-White (man) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, being the class nerd hasn't stopped me from being naive: none of my so-called friends has talked to me since the last day of exams. FML

Today, I moved fifteen stacks of bricks from our store to a customer's van. After I made all that effort, he decided he didn't like the colour of the bricks after all, and demanded a full refund. FML

#21197488
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45650) - you deserved it (3327)

On 07/03/2014 at 3:49pm - misc - by starflares (man) - Denmark (Centre)



FML's blog

  • Angie's illustrated FML
  • Here we go again. This week I'm talking to you live from the Paris Japan Expo. I'm dressed up as Bernard from the Sailor Moon series, and I almost got kicked out because my katana wasn't the…

Friday 3 July 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: