tmaq973

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tmaq973

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1286
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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tmaq973's page activity

Visits<b>Reva750</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 4:57pm<b>LostMuffins</b> - the 09/29/2013 at 5:19pm<b>ImImature</b> - the 07/01/2013 at 1:56pm<b>HeatherSuzanne</b> - the 03/04/2013 at 1:33am<b>HungryADE</b> - the 01/26/2013 at 12:33am<b>taylorperson</b> - the 12/28/2012 at 4:47pm<b>ycrem0n</b> - the 10/28/2012 at 9:16am

tmaq973's FML badges

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of tmaq973's badges

tmaq973's favorite FMLs

Today, I confessed my feelings to the girl I've been in love with for three years. Her response was to well up, start crying, and ask me why I had to have chosen her. FML

by Oraashi / 06/26/2012 at 1:18pm / United Kingdom (Stoke-on-Trent) / Love

Today, I got a cramp while swimming. It took the lifeguard 5 minutes to stop flirting with a girl before trying to help me. FML

by EdgardoP / 06/26/2012 at 11:08am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, another car slammed into me. By the time I got out to assess the damage, the other car was empty and there was nobody in sight. Either Moby Dickwad was abducted by aliens mid-crash, or he was behind on his insurance payments. FML

by Boar / 06/24/2012 at 4:51pm / United States (New Mexico) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to put one of my preschool students in timeout for masturbating during nap time. FML

by lindsaykay / 04/17/2012 at 8:07pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was at a party, when the cops busted us. Since I'm underage, I hid behind a chair for an hour and a half while they breathalyzed everyone and sat them in the same room I was in. The cops left, everyone realized I was behind the chair, and now my nickname is "Anne Frank". FML

by Anonymous / 04/12/2012 at 2:31pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me that he believes getting kicked in the balls is a scientifically-proven method of birth control. FML

by Jordan / 04/08/2012 at 6:37am / Australia (New South Wales) / Intimacy

Today, I watched my cat walk to her litter box, look at it, then walk across the room to pee on a backpack. FML

by tessamarque / 04/05/2012 at 11:07am / United States (Oklahoma) / Animals

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, after a year and a half, I finally admitted to myself that I'm in an abusive relationship. Not with a person though, with my cat. FML

by Nicole557 / 11/03/2011 at 6:56am / United States / Animals

Today, I found out that my neighbors took it upon themselves to knock down the fence we shared, and putting up a new one. Thus fencing my pool into their yard. When I asked them why, he replied, "We thought you weren't coming back." I was gone for 4 months tending to my sister with breast cancer. FML

by Pool-less / 09/04/2011 at 2:09am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, while flicking my bean, I was thinking about my boyfriend who moved to California last week. Before I came, I had to stop because I started crying. FML

by Anonymous / 08/14/2011 at 8:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, after three weeks of putting it off, I decided to ask out the girl I've had a major crush on since third grade. When I told her, she smiled, but then quickly said, "But aren't you gay?" FML

by straightasaneedle / 02/02/2011 at 12:11pm / Germany (Hessen) / Love

Today, I overheard my boyfriend of two years tell his friend he was going to "pop the question". Ecstatic, I wore my nicest dress and got my hair done for dinner. Near the end, he leant in romantically and asked if we could start doing anal. So much for marriage. FML

by snoozerlooser / 12/24/2010 at 7:00pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I realized that not only am I still an unpublished author, but I can't even get an FML posted after submitting several in the last year. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2010 at 8:43am / United Kingdom (London) / Work

Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML

by sickkid / 11/23/2009 at 1:05pm / United States (California) / Intimacy