Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tj4234

Search for a member

tj4234
  • Town/Country : Inverness, Scotland
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 22 May 1992 (21 years)
  • Number of visits : 2258
  • Number of comments : 988
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

About tj4234 : I like guitar, motorcycles and martial arts.

tj4234's last visitors

Trekenjerryjextrasnipesrachelcasperzeriously95Mike_SweatpantsDrWafflez6dandaman5ohmandapantsaelathehuntresscosmicriver

tj4234's FML badges

Picture this FML

You have left your mark on an illustrated FML’s presentation blog article.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

See all of tj4234's badges

tj4234's favorite FMLs

Today, I was knocked into a wall by a high-pressure water cannon suddenly kicking in. I was only going to the corner store to buy some chocolate. Probably serves me right for not noticing a small riot due to a thumping hangover. FML

#17474756
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18149) - you deserved it (5718)

On 08/14/2011 at 10:39pm - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, while flicking my bean, I was thinking about my boyfriend who moved to California last week. Before I came, I had to stop because I started crying. FML

#17473520
204 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22857) - you deserved it (6883)

On 08/14/2011 at 8:25pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my religious parents were hosting a family dinner. Not only did we have to wait over an hour for my grandma to finally show up, but when she did, she had her 30 year old boytoy in tow. Apparently, "Granny has needs too you know, hahaha!" Goodbye peaceful family. FML

#17471582
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22468) - you deserved it (2587)

On 08/14/2011 at 4:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, I walked in on my mom ranting on about what a useless bitch I am. She was talking to my cat. It's not the first time this has happened, either. FML

#17471195
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27888) - you deserved it (3334)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:32pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while out shopping, I noticed a seedy bum kept following a girl around the store. Trying to be a good samaritan, I trailed them into the street. The bum jogged up behind her and looked like he was about to grab her, so I ran up and tackled him to the ground. Turns out he was her father. FML

#17471186
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20426) - you deserved it (12508)

On 08/14/2011 at 3:31pm - misc - by fuck (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, the guy at Subway asked if I wanted to make my sandwich a footlong. I'm not sure what came over me, but before I realized what I was saying, I'd told him that I couldn't handle 12 inches. FML

#17470290
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24305) - you deserved it (9032)

On 08/14/2011 at 1:44pm - misc - by Username - United States (New York)

Today, two Jehovah's Witnesses rang my doorbell for the 10th time. This time they asked me whether I knew Faith's greatest enemy. I replied, "Basic reasoning?" A copy of The Watchtower can really hurt when it hits you in the eye. FML

#17468167
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30018) - you deserved it (8708)

On 08/14/2011 at 7:20am - misc - by Goaway (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was painting my room. I told my mom not to open the door because I was on a ladder just behind it, with a paint can perched atop. She barged in to ask me what I'd said. FML

#17459271
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27823) - you deserved it (4281)

On 08/13/2011 at 11:31am - misc - by NotSoAnon (man) - United States

Today, I was using a public urinal when a man came up to use the one next to me. As he approached, he said, "Friendly spy plane inbound" and pretended to look at my knob. FML

#17448380
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24767) - you deserved it (2452)

On 08/12/2011 at 6:40am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my friend and I went for a late night walk along the beach. We decided to sit down on a log. It was a dead seal. FML

#17447833
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39069) - you deserved it (5894)

On 08/12/2011 at 3:44am - animals - by squishylog - United States (California)

Today, I walked outside my house to find my father in nothing but his underwear, spraying ants with ant-killer, laughing like a maniac and screaming, "Die bitches! Die!" FML

#17447180
237 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29643) - you deserved it (4066)

On 08/12/2011 at 2:17am - misc - by TuteSweet - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my car was broken into, and they stole all my CDs, but left my daughter's Black Eyed Peas CD behind. I'm pretty pissed about the theft, but almost glad to see that the delinquents in my town have a decent taste in music. FML

#17444868
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27535) - you deserved it (3768)

On 08/11/2011 at 10:30pm - money - by Musicfan - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, no matter how much I begged, my friend who'd locked himself away with my iPhone wouldn't stop taking pics of his penis and forwarding them to my boss. FML

#17438897
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43048) - you deserved it (4550)

On 08/11/2011 at 8:56am - intimacy - by bob - United States (Texas)

Today, was the first day of my sophomore year. While receiving my schedule, I burst into tears at the sight of a disfigured midget. I'm now seen as the school bitch for making fun of a midget. I have a genuine fear of midgets. FML

Today, I was camping with my family, and had to share a tent with my 13 year old brother. During the night he had to pee, but instead of going outside to use the bathroom, he zipped open a section of the tent, stuck his knob through it, and peed all over my shoes that were drying outside. FML

#17431437
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26465) - you deserved it (2511)

On 08/10/2011 at 5:37pm - misc - by jakethed0g (woman) - United Kingdom (Coventry)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: