tissueuser

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tissueuser

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 29 June 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 505
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

About tissueuser : Im 21 from Dublin, Ireland, Im a student and work part-time, thats not it, but im only gonna stay here so long.....

tissueuser's page activity

Visits<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:22pm<b>CourtneyDanielle</b> - the 02/15/2011 at 8:06pm<b>lmc94</b> - the 02/13/2011 at 2:35pm<b>CherriBerri</b> - the 02/12/2011 at 11:36am<b>HappinessForFree</b> - the 02/10/2011 at 12:52am<b>2_hayden</b> - the 02/01/2011 at 2:51pm<b>Ur_REmEdy</b> - the 01/27/2011 at 10:21am<b>OhHeySara</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 5:45pm<b>JERZBornNRaised</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 5:43pm<b>ilovejunkfood</b> - the 01/26/2011 at 5:35pm<b></b> - the 01/24/2011 at 4:19pm<b>dirtynsweet</b> - the 01/22/2011 at 10:57am<b>ColdBlackLies</b> - the 01/17/2011 at 1:59pm<b>ZombiePanda101</b> - the 01/17/2011 at 1:34pm<b>Daaniellee1234</b> - the 01/14/2011 at 1:43am<b>papaya_master</b> - the 01/12/2011 at 4:50am<b>littlesunshine</b> - the 01/11/2011 at 4:39pm<b>LightningLadyy</b> - the 01/05/2011 at 6:35pm

tissueuser's FML badges

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of tissueuser's badges

tissueuser's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to take an emergency contraceptive. I was talking to my boyfriend about it, and I told him that my stomach really hurt. His response? "Aw. That's just the baby dying." FML

by greenchan / 02/25/2011 at 12:12am / United States (Vermont) / Intimacy

Today, I took a picture of myself and put it on Facebook. After I did so, I realized that in the background, you can see my crush's Facebook page up on my laptop. He tagged himself. FML

by verasam01 / 02/24/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

by Anonymous / 02/01/2011 at 8:43am / United States / Love

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 1:24am / France / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture of his morning dump because it was heart-shaped. FML

by SkinsCastSelection / 01/17/2011 at 1:24am / France / Love

Today, my boyfriend told me to stuff my bra before going to a party with him and his friends because he didn't want to be embarrassed. FML

by Anonymous / 01/01/2011 at 7:51pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I walked to school in -5 degree weather, snow up to ankles, for an exam. The school had closed and warned all the parents, but mine didn't tell me, because it was "funnier". FML

by stupid / 12/21/2010 at 10:21am / Ireland (Meath) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

by Anonymous / 10/13/2010 at 9:20am / Spain (Asturias) / Intimacy

Today, I had to buy a wrist brace for a repetitive strain injury. I got the injury because I was knitting too much. I'm 22. FML

by GrannyAt22 / 06/21/2010 at 9:28pm / Canada (Saskatchewan) / Health

Today, I realized explosive diarrhea can happen, and at the most inopportune times, such as on the day of MY wedding. At the alter while my husband said his vows. FML

by pain / 02/26/2010 at 5:23am / Japan / Love

Today, I almost crashed my car because I was checking out an Old Navy mannequin wearing a bra. FML

by Creepster / 01/13/2010 at 1:31am / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML

by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML

by RC3Welly / 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, my 5 year old nephew showed me green martians he'd made with his new Play Doh set. I smiled and said, "Wow! Now, how about some blue martians!" He looked at me and replied, "How about some blue shut the fuck up?!" FML

by offbeans / 02/16/2009 at 9:29pm / United States (California) / Kids