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tikimuppet

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tikimuppet
  • Town/Country : devon, england
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 December 1990 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 4151
  • Number of comments : 145
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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tikimuppet's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of tikimuppet's badges

tikimuppet's favorite FMLs

Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML

#4274462
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46435) - you deserved it (6753)

On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I discovered that I have developed an allergy to salt water on my face. Now, every time I sweat or cry, I come up in a bright red rash. I am allergic to my own bodily fluids. FML

#4226851
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57494) - you deserved it (2902)

On 08/02/2009 at 8:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML

#4223881
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46015) - you deserved it (8905)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my friends had ditched me for a party I hadn't been invited to so I was sitting home alone. The only other thing in my house was the mosquito I nicknamed Fred. I liked to watch Fred fly around and try to suck my blood. 20 minutes later, I found Fred's dead body. I was actually sad. FML

#4158002
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55303) - you deserved it (16741)

On 07/30/2009 at 10:43am - animals - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia) - moderated by the Jackass crew

Today, I was riding my motorcycle when I saw my cheating ex-wife walking down the road. Out of anger, I spat my gum at her. I forgot that my helmet's visor was still down, so when I spat, the gum stuck against it. I was temporarily blinded and I crashed into some bushes. FML

#4142743
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10658) - you deserved it (66553)

On 07/29/2009 at 8:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML

#4137470
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51610) - you deserved it (2584)

On 07/29/2009 at 4:23pm - work - by allocomrade (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I tried to break up with my boyfriend. He said no. FML

#3991086
329 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53112) - you deserved it (24654)

On 07/23/2009 at 10:26pm - love - by Ella (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my mom and I went to Winn-Dixie. I told her I was going to a different isle 5 minutes later I hear my name on the intercom to go to the front of the store. As I go I see my mom crying, she comes and hugs me and tells me she thought I was lost. Im 22, I had my cell phone, and I drove there. FML

#992222
248 comments

I agree, your life sucks (117437) - you deserved it (6619)

On 04/15/2009 at 2:38pm - misc - by SwimSquid (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, as a prank I shook my girlfriend's can of soda. I hadn't noticed that it was already open. FML

#632
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3195) - you deserved it (39127)

On 12/30/2008 at 6:14am - misc - by Simon - Sent from mobile version



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  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

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