tikimuppet

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Offline (the 10/19/2014 at 1:18am)

tikimuppet

4Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5641
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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tikimuppet's page activity

Visits<b>heli110</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:45pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 1:12pm<b>hunter1019</b> - the 04/03/2016 at 8:50pm<b>rivimatt</b> - the 03/15/2016 at 12:04pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 03/09/2016 at 1:54am<b>jurgen15948501</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 11:42pm<b>CherryLips27</b> - the 03/06/2016 at 3:24pm<b>Axios280</b> - the 02/26/2016 at 4:21pm<b>LoneWolf2879</b> - the 02/17/2016 at 9:23am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 6:11pm<b>Nahpets</b> - the 01/07/2016 at 12:11am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 12/28/2015 at 12:44pm<b>Anubis94</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 11:53am<b>NerdyTherapist</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 6:02pm<b>JennixPanda</b> - the 12/03/2015 at 1:59pm<b>StarOfDoom</b> - the 11/26/2015 at 1:16am<b>fantasyworld</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 5:26pm<b>LittlePengy</b> - the 11/22/2015 at 2:03am

Fucked!<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:11am<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 5:56am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 4:11pm<b>lurch87</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:55am

tikimuppet's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of tikimuppet's badges

tikimuppet's favorite FMLs

Today, I held a door open for my boyfriend and jokingly said, "Chivalry is dead?" He responded with, "Who's chivalry?" FML

by Anonymous / 04/14/2011 at 1:49am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I freaked out when the remote wouldn't unlock my car. I stood in the rain trying to open the door. Unsure of what to do next, I called my boyfriend. He told me to "put the key in the door". I had forgotten about that option. FML

by andimanastudent / 04/13/2011 at 5:44pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Transportation

Today, we had a tornado warning and I told my parents I loved them, just in case. My dad just said "see you in Kansas". FML

by anonymous / 04/10/2011 at 11:26pm / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out that using a certain hand sanitizer as masturbation lube will put you in the hospital and result in having to wear an adult diaper for a week. FML

by JJMan217 / 03/29/2011 at 2:28am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, I got 2 creams for a skin condition. The one for my face says "Don't expose skin to sun after use of this product". The one for the rest of my body says "This product relies on exposure to the sun". In other words, I have to be outside as much as I can, naked and with a box on my head. FML

by FromNL / 03/25/2011 at 8:22am / Netherlands (Zuid-Holland) / Health

Today, my wife created a "Points Reward" system for the privilege of sex. 10 points for doing the dishes, 20 for the laundry, etc. How many points do I need before I can have sex with her? 2300. FML

by Anonymous / 03/22/2011 at 10:59am / United States (California) / Intimacy

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm / United Kingdom (Wiltshire) / Geek

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

by failureparent / 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, in an attempt to impress a girl I like, I tried to crush a soda can by hitting it with my forehead. Not only did I fail, I knocked myself out in the process. When I regained consciousness, the girl was gone and someone had taken the liberty of drawing a penis on my face. FML

by Anonymous / 03/13/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend said he wanted to try something new. By something new, it was to put flour in my butt and see what would happen if I farted. FML

by Username / 03/12/2011 at 12:10am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

by Anon / 03/10/2011 at 10:08am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend set up a very romantic dinner. Afterwards, he offered to wash the dishes while I went upstairs and relaxed. His way of washing the dishes was to scrape all the food off, then wipe the juices off the dishes with a paper towel before putting them back in the cupboards. FML

by Myboyfriendisaromanticslob / 03/10/2011 at 12:09am / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend convinced me that a staple gun doesn't work on skin. I decided to put this new piece of information to the test. FML

by ouch / 03/08/2011 at 10:50am / United Kingdom (London) / Health

Today, we had to discuss our heritage at school. When I told the class that I am German, Japanese, and of the Jewish faith, the teacher loudly laughs at the "irony." Something like this happens whenever I tell people my background. FML

by Anonymous / 03/06/2011 at 12:18am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my dad got drunk and asked if I had inherited his "abnormally tiny penis." FML

by nick / 03/05/2011 at 8:42pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Health