This member hasn't filled in their description.
tikimuppet's FML badges
An insomniac or a creature of the dark
You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.
tikimuppet's favorite FMLs
Today, my constant bragging to friends caught up with me, and everyone believes I'm a swinger. Because of this, no girl wants to go out with me, in case they become just another notch under my belt. The truth is, I'm still a virgin. FML
by Anonymous / 07/23/2011 at 7:53pm / United States / Love
by Baconcook3000 / 07/23/2011 at 7:00am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/22/2011 at 9:10pm / United States (New York) / Love
by Anonymous / 07/22/2011 at 2:29am / United States (Texas) / Love
by Yoda / 07/08/2011 at 1:23am / United States (New York) / Geek
Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML
by Fmylife / 07/06/2011 at 5:17am / United States (Washington) / Health
by beardedlady / 07/02/2011 at 2:44am / United States (Arkansas) / Intimacy
Today, on the bus, a delusional old man had an extremely long conversation with me, referring to me as "Leslie" and talking about "our childhood together". Not wanting to hurt his feelings I played along. At his stop he got up and grinned at me, saying "I'm kidding. I never knew a Leslie in my life. Nice rack." FML
by Anonymous / 06/26/2011 at 2:12am / United States (Indiana) / Transportation
Today, after eighteen years of living with my adoptive parents, I met my biological mum for the first time. She's a forty year old, 300lb American woman who wears 'Twilight' t-shirts and will be spending the rest of her visit to the UK trying to find Robert Pattinson. She says I remind her of herself. FML
by Adoptee / 05/22/2011 at 7:09pm / United Kingdom (Leicestershire) / Kids
Today, it was raining heavily. I saw a large puddle by the edge of the road near with a passing lady. Thinking it would be funny to splash her, I swerved to hit the puddle. The puddle was deeper than I thought. I lost control of the car, spun out, and hit two parked cars. FML
by Anonymous / 05/21/2011 at 2:22am / United States (Utah) / Transportation
by Burnt / 05/02/2011 at 5:33am / United States (Texas) / Health
by nomorexbox / 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek
by Username / 04/21/2011 at 2:30pm / United States / Intimacy
by killercow / 04/19/2011 at 12:19pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous
by Username / 04/16/2011 at 1:14am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous