tikimuppet

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Offline (the 10/19/2014 at 1:18am)

tikimuppet

6Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 11 December 1990 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 6145
  • Number of comments : 146
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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tikimuppet's page activity

Visits<b>TexanZaros</b> - the 11/23/2016 at 10:00pm<b>brian1976</b> - the 11/09/2016 at 12:03pm<b>shabadabba</b> - the 10/19/2016 at 10:16pm<b>anonyferret</b> - the 09/15/2016 at 6:55am<b>Helldemon</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 7:10pm<b>gar2014</b> - the 09/11/2016 at 4:54pm<b>Parkourlife20</b> - the 09/01/2016 at 5:18pm<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/15/2016 at 8:49pm<b>Tomato_Cheese</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 10:07pm<b>Jacob031300</b> - the 07/18/2016 at 10:33pm<b>C00k13monster</b> - the 07/10/2016 at 5:26pm<b>vincentjules</b> - the 06/24/2016 at 7:03am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 06/18/2016 at 12:58pm<b>dontmindme7</b> - the 06/12/2016 at 7:02pm<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 05/24/2016 at 1:31am<b>_kevinkim</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 10:57pm<b>heli110</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:45pm<b>Joshwarrior</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 1:12pm

Fucked!<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 2:49am<b>Jiratias</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 11:12pm<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:11am<b>dirtbikeguy</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 5:56am<b>ToxicTyrael</b> - the 08/12/2015 at 4:11pm<b>lurch87</b> - the 05/09/2015 at 2:55am

tikimuppet's FML badges

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of tikimuppet's badges

tikimuppet's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

by Anonymous / 03/09/2012 at 5:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. It was going well until she started talking dirty, saying stuff like, "You like my tushy, baby?" "I want to fellate you so bad," and "You'll need some ice after this one." My boner practically retracted into my body. FML

by ugh / 01/30/2012 at 7:25pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I was out clubbing, when some bloke at the bar started trying to pick fights with everyone. Trying to defuse the situation with humour, I said, "I used to be a tough guy like you. Then I took an arrow in the knee." The next thing I know, I have a broken nose. FML

by Anonymous / 12/23/2011 at 9:49pm / Australia / Health

Today, I went down on my boyfriend for the first time. Afterwards, he laid on the bed, silent and naked in the fetal position, I had to sit there stroking his head for an hour. I think I raped my boyfriend. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2011 at 6:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

by Anonymous / 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm / United States (Texas) / Transportation

Today, I had a blind date with a really cute guy. Just when I was about to invite him back to my place for a nightcap, he took out a catalog of Russian mail-order brides and asked for my help in picking out the best one. FML

by NotRussian / 10/03/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Love

Today, I caught my boyfriend of two years cheating on me. Instead of the usual excuses, he panicked and claimed he was my boyfriend's long-lost twin brother. He even tried to put on a fake accent. FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my school voted for a Pokémon theme for this year's homecoming. FML

by ohgodwhy / 09/18/2011 at 5:16pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

by awesomekidsmum / 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I was installing updates on my 16 year old daughter's laptop, when I got the urge to snoop around. I found a 5,000 word sex story involving her and the Edward and Jacob weirdos from the Twilight movies. I can't even look her in the eyes. I can't believe I raised this freak. FML

by f*ckingdisgusted / 08/26/2011 at 9:13pm / United States / Kids

Today, my beloved pet chicken ran away from home. I got so distraught that my dad offered to buy me dinner. Specifically, KFC. FML

by xXangelaXx / 08/21/2011 at 2:23pm / United States / Animals

Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML

by Jace / 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm / United Kingdom (Aberdeen City) / Love

Today, was the first day of my sophomore year. While receiving my schedule, I burst into tears at the sight of a disfigured midget. I'm now seen as the school bitch for making fun of a midget. I have a genuine fear of midgets. FML

by maryrain / 08/11/2011 at 5:35am / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I asked a guy if he could buy me a pack of cigarettes, since I'm still under 18. He took my money, went into the supermarket, and must have slipped out a side-entrance, because he never came back. FML

by Joe / 08/04/2011 at 2:28pm / United States (Florida) / Money

Today, in health class, I raised my hand and asked if you could get an STD from dogs. I have officially now ruined any extremely small chance I had of being popular. FML

by loser4life / 07/30/2011 at 12:38am / United States (Colorado) / Animals