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About tigerlilypop : Hi, I'm Taylor. I enjoy breakfast foods almost as much as I enjoy your face
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Today, my crush walked me home. As my mom opens the door, she tells me in Russian how ugly he is, and that I have extremely bad taste. Out of all the languages in the world, he happens to be fluent in Russian. FML
Today, I was sitting on the toilet when I felt something brush my shoulder. I turned around in fright, and one of my bum cheeks slipped off the seat and into the toilet, making me fall sideways and hit my face on the toilet roll holder. I now have a black eye. It was my hair on my shoulder. FML
Today, at the eye doctor, they asked for my birth date for the files. My dad answered quickly, "May 28, 1994." It was embarrassing to have to correct him with "April 19, 1993." Who's May 28? Way to go dad. FML
Today, I had sex with my girlfriend in her room. That means: Jonas Brothers posters on the wall, Jonas Brothers pillows, sheets, comforter and stuffed dog. After we did it, she apologized to her posters for having to see that, since they're pure. FML
Friday 6 December 2013