thompson45acp

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Offline (the 08/18/2015 at 6:14am)

thompson45acp

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 17 May 1996 (19 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 768
  • Number of comments : 9
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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thompson45acp's page activity

Visits<b>xyris</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 6:41pm<b>FrostyWater741</b> - the 06/24/2015 at 4:48pm<b>xninix</b> - the 01/20/2015 at 9:09pm<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 9:36am<b>Lorenzzon</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 6:09am<b>ksadhera</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 5:58pm<b>kittyfrozen</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 1:05pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 12/16/2014 at 11:51am<b>BellaBelle</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 6:01pm<b>AJAM222</b> - the 07/29/2013 at 5:44pm<b>MrsWojtowicz</b> - the 01/11/2012 at 2:51pm

thompson45acp's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

See all of thompson45acp's badges

thompson45acp's favorite FMLs

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

by Anonymous / 04/30/2012 at 5:34pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

by lebato97 / 12/08/2011 at 10:35pm / United States (Louisiana) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

by religionbites621 / 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm / United States (Tennessee) / Transportation

Today, I found a note on my door that said "I masturbate to your pictures on Facebook." Someone else wrote "like" at the bottom. FML

by Anonymous / 11/12/2011 at 12:34am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I discovered my sister has a crystal meth problem when she set fire to our house. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2011 at 11:11pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got yelled at by my boss for being insensitive to a customer. I'd told her I never heard of the requested item even existing. She walked off shouting, screaming and throwing stuff from the shelf. She wanted to order a bird feeder with heated perches so the bird's feet won't get cold. FML

by midwesternpetclerk / 11/08/2011 at 11:06pm / United States / Work

Today, I was driving home from work with the window down. I felt what I thought was rain coming through the window, until I looked over and realized it was urine mist coming from the cattle truck next to me. FML

by Anonymous / 11/08/2011 at 6:33pm / United States / Transportation

Today, I got mugged by a guy who was threatening me with a stapler. FML

by StaplerScared / 11/08/2011 at 9:39am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

by possiblyoverweight / 11/08/2011 at 9:01am / United Kingdom (Bristol) / Kids

Today, I was yelled at by a customer because I couldn't tell her where the vitamins were in the pharmacy. The manager came and yelled at me for being lazy and incompetent. I work in the store across the street from the pharmacy. FML

by jodafish / 11/08/2011 at 12:45am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, I got shot at. Not by police, but by a hunter. While at work. Driving a garbage truck. How the hell a hunter mistook an orange-clad garbageman in a truck for a deer is beyond me. FML

by lprocter1982 / 11/07/2011 at 10:17pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

by Luke / 11/07/2011 at 9:53am / United States (Virginia) / Money

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

by Dlord357 / 11/07/2011 at 9:24am / United States (Florida) / Work

Today, my mother panicked and was about to report me missing when I didn't answer her calls while I was at a movie. I'm 31, and have lived on my own for over 10 years. FML

by maf811 / 11/07/2011 at 7:13am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I caught three kids setting fire to a bush. After chasing them off, I parked my bike by a house and went to get water. After I'd put the fire out, I walked back to my bike just in time to see the kids running off with it. FML

by Isoldael / 11/07/2011 at 4:38am / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Miscellaneous