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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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theodivine

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theodivine
  • Town/Country : Richmond, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 17 December 1989 (22 years)
  • Number of visits : 2379
  • Number of comments : 158
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About theodivine : AIM: jive bombersssss

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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

theodivine's favorite FMLs

Today, I was fined because my son pushed the alarm button in the elevator. Why? There was a spider in there. FML

#7113361 (90)

I agree, your life sucks (18099) - you deserved it (1941)

On 01/02/2010 at 10:22pm - kids - by arachnidphobia (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my boyfriend asked me why girls don't have armpit hair. FML

#6758302 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (19629) - you deserved it (4093)

On 12/14/2009 at 11:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, at work, I watched a man throw up in his hands, dump the contents on his plate, then eat the things it "didn't touch". I had to wash his plate. FML

#6752832 (61)

I agree, your life sucks (21315) - you deserved it (1064)

On 12/14/2009 at 3:23pm - work - by militarywife2b - Sent from mobile version

Today, I checked into my flight early. The kiosk asked me if I wanted an earlier flight for $50. Awesome. I swiped my card then continued to the next screen where I was informed my new flight was delayed to the same time as my original flight. FML

#6751982 (32)

I agree, your life sucks (24247) - you deserved it (3720)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:08pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was trying to write an essay for school while sleep deprived. After getting 7 pages into it, I crashed face-first onto the keyboard and slept for 20 minutes. When I woke up, my essay was nothing more than a blank document. My face had been pressing the Backspace button the entire time. FML

#6250740 (172)

I agree, your life sucks (13643) - you deserved it (21888)

On 11/10/2009 at 10:38pm - misc - by IHateYouBackspace (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my credit card number was stolen. The thief used it to purchase identity theft protection. FML

#6248047 (70)

I agree, your life sucks (24605) - you deserved it (1474)

On 11/10/2009 at 8:17pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I got a new CD player for my car and an alarm installed for added security. After work, I saw my windows smashed, the CD player gone, the alarm wires cut, and a note that said, "Try again." FML

#6243414 (82)

I agree, your life sucks (24673) - you deserved it (1501)

On 11/10/2009 at 2:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I took my car through the car wash. I got bored, so turned the radio on, forgetting that the aerial/antenna on the car is automatic. My car aerial is now bent at a 90 degree angle and about to fall off. The radio is half white noise, half stuff that may or may not be free jazz jam sessions. FML

#6036735 (45)

I agree, your life sucks (4507) - you deserved it (20758)

On 10/28/2009 at 6:14am - misc - by ohsnap (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my parents had a fight, which is a pretty normal occurence at our house. But today, they fought over an orange. Dad is now sitting in his bedroom with the aforementioned orange. FML

#6003671 (99)

I agree, your life sucks (22383) - you deserved it (1493)

On 10/26/2009 at 6:15am - misc - by Roida (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my daughter threw a can of hairspray into the fireplace because she saw someone do it on YouTube. FML

#5987362 (110)

I agree, your life sucks (30324) - you deserved it (3241)

On 10/25/2009 at 5:06am - kids - by oh dear - Sent from mobile version

Today, I went on a date with an awesome guy. I got super hammered and punched him in the face. FML

#5894935 (104)

I agree, your life sucks (5341) - you deserved it (40643)

On 10/19/2009 at 11:42am - love - by DrunkGirl - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got an email from the company that manages my Cat's microchip informing me that I had to update my information that had been entered by the local Humane Society. Apparently, they listed my cat "Coral" as the owner, and me as the pet. To change it, they needed the cat's signature. FML

#5663418 (173)

I agree, your life sucks (38502) - you deserved it (2780)

On 10/05/2009 at 3:23pm - animals - by APetsPet (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML

#5443972 (163)

I agree, your life sucks (49746) - you deserved it (1568)

On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I got written up at work for making a customer feel bad. I made him feel bad by laughing uncontrollably at him when he asked if we sold real light sabers. FML

#4945684 (161)

I agree, your life sucks (37365) - you deserved it (9231)

On 08/31/2009 at 1:18am - work - by Timmah (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML

#4933603 (266)

I agree, your life sucks (44797) - you deserved it (3099)

On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)