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This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Up and coming moderator
It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
theluckygirl28's favorite FMLs
by cherry / 04/10/2009 at 5:43am / Australia (Queensland) / Intimacy
Today, I was having a horrible day. I was laying on the couch, crying, when my dog came up on the couch to console me. I was thinking about how great it was to have a dog, because they're there for you when no one else is. As I was sobbing, I heard something. My dog farted into my mouth. Twice. FML
by BadBreath / 04/08/2009 at 11:43pm / United States (Minnesota) / Animals
Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
by creepermagnet / 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm / United States (Maryland) / Love
Today, I was so drunk that my friends put me to bed during a party. Later I find out that while I was passed out two of my friends came in and had sex while I was in the same bed. They tried to use me as a prop. Now my friends call me the love wedge. FML
by lovewedge / 03/08/2009 at 8:25pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
- Today, I had plans for a romantic night with my boyfriend, who is perfect in every way possible. We… Today, while having sex, I thought I was having an orgasm for the first time. Turns out I was just… Today, my boyfriend again told me how he wants to have an open relationship. Of course, this means…