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thedoenut

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thedoenut

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  • Number of visits : 83
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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thedoenut's page activity

Visits<b>tailyerd</b> - the 10/04/2014 at 8:47pm<b>miyaviichan</b> - the 10/07/2013 at 2:43pm<b>blackwidowtaco</b> - the 08/20/2013 at 7:56pm

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thedoenut's favorite FMLs

Today, my 14-year-old daughter came home after sneaking out and partying. She was totally drunk, and started crying on my shoulder because some boy named "Thomas" has a small dick, and she had to fake an orgasm. FML

#20419819
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (80172) - you deserved it (24600)

On 12/24/2012 at 10:03pm - intimacy - by valnaj1 (woman) - Denmark (Syddanmark)

Today, I discovered that the only reason my husband is taking yoga classes with me is because he wants to be flexible enough to suck his own rod. FML

#19996058
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33773) - you deserved it (5903)

On 08/01/2012 at 5:02am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, an asshat in a Foghorn Leghorn t-shirt let his piece-of-crap mongrel dog do some sort of rain dance on the roof of my car, scratching the paintwork. He was a huge guy, so my backbone left town and I just smiled as if it was cute. FML

#18251877
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20307) - you deserved it (9833)

On 11/14/2011 at 11:51pm - animals - by MY CAR (man) - United States (California)

Today, while waiting in line at Gamestop, another customer and the cashier started chatting about how Pokémon is for kids, and anyone over 10 who's into it is weird. Embarrassed, I put the new Pokémon game back on the shelf and snuck out of the store. FML

#17830762
559 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28392) - you deserved it (17106)

On 09/25/2011 at 3:18pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, a man with a face like a corpse's shoe started talking to me in the long queue at the Post Office. Apparently, his mother invented the banana, and he's first in line for the throne in France if ever Prince Harry dies. And his breath smelled like Satan's ass gas. FML

#17496000
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27737) - you deserved it (3338)

On 08/17/2011 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I shat out a staple. FML

#16576766
333 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37518) - you deserved it (16317)

On 06/09/2011 at 11:04am - health - by wtf - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, while discussing having sex for the first time with my boyfriend, I asked what method of birth control we should use. He replied, "Anal." FML

#15627116
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46817) - you deserved it (13869)

On 04/03/2011 at 9:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to see "Black Swan" with my parents, not realizing that it was basically a porno. So I sat next to my dad while Mila Kunis and Natalie Portman had passionate lesbian sex on a twenty foot screen. And I'm pretty sure I heard the old guy behind us jacking off. FML

#14689182
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35039) - you deserved it (6447)

On 01/23/2011 at 7:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my mom was taking an online IQ test. To the question "On which continent is Canada located?" she responded "Antarctica." If intelligence is genetic, I'm screwed. FML

#12438050
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30647) - you deserved it (3168)

On 08/10/2010 at 7:19pm - misc - by Brandon (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, my pet rat had babies. We've only ever owned one rat. FML

#8341933
378 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25903) - you deserved it (5356)

On 02/16/2010 at 3:48pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was watching TV. During a very long commercial break, I found my brothers PSP charger next to me. Out of boredom I put my tongue on the end on the metal. Not only did it fry my tongue but found its way to my metal filling in my tooth. I now have a sore tongue and a throbbing toothache. FML

#6803548
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (4669) - you deserved it (71124)

On 12/17/2009 at 11:25pm - misc - by Shocked (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was dumped by my boyfriend of almost a year because he was no longer sexually attracted to me because I'm "overweight," even though I only weigh 130 pounds. Afterward I went to my friend's house and sat in an old wooden chair. It broke into pieces as soon as I sat down. FML

#214714
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (85104) - you deserved it (8915)

On 03/05/2009 at 1:38am - misc - by saltinawound (woman) - United States (Louisiana)



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  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

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