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texas_girl97

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texas_girl97

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  • Number of visits : 48
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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texas_girl97's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my girlfriend to go see Les Misérables. I tried to stay tough but completely lost it and started sobbing when Anne Hathaway began singing. My girlfriend called me a wimp and stayed dry-eyed throughout the whole movie. I'm dating a robot. FML

#20439162
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30664) - you deserved it (13532)

On 01/02/2013 at 6:38pm - misc - by Les Miserables is so sad (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my 6-year-old nephew opened his Christmas gift. The first words out of his mouth were, "This is cheap." FML

#20427233
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31444) - you deserved it (6335)

On 12/28/2012 at 2:03am - kids - by UngratefulBrat - United States (New York)

Today, my car was broken into. What was stolen? My daughter's $11 One Direction poster. What will it cost to fix my car? $1,000. FML

#20427068
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36320) - you deserved it (3651)

On 12/27/2012 at 11:58pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, it's my wedding anniversary; my husband forgot. My daughter gave me two beautiful long stem roses and said she would look after her sister while we went out to celebrate. My daughter is more romantic and thoughtful than my own husband. FML

#20410075
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36376) - you deserved it (3456)

On 12/20/2012 at 10:31pm - love - by igiveup (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, at my new job, some juvenile cockbite spiked my food with a laxative, as part of some kind of bizarre hazing ritual. The bastard got ratted out and suspended, but my arsehole now feels like it's been blown apart by a nuclear warhead. I thought this shit only happened in movies. FML

#20409224
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29351) - you deserved it (6144)

On 12/20/2012 at 4:49pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, someone painted the "Dark Mark" on the side of my car. It won't come off and my kids refuse to get in because it means "a wizard died in there." FML

#20407286
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33029) - you deserved it (3604)

On 12/19/2012 at 9:59am - kids - by spellbound - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, at a Christmas party, my crush came up to me and cutely pointed out that I was standing under mistletoe. The only response my stupid brain could think of was, "Probably full of nargles though." He gave me a confused look and walked away. FML

#20402533
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27101) - you deserved it (12841)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:51pm - love - by Rhine (woman) - Barbados (Saint Michael)

Today, I spent nearly half an hour trying to dispel my sister's belief that men have to strap down their penises before going jogging. FML

#20402473
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28074) - you deserved it (3491)

On 12/16/2012 at 6:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland (Waterford)

Today, after two weeks of being grounded, I was finally let out of the house by my mom. I had to call her at 1am asking her to come get me, because I got so drunk, I told my ride to leave without me. I'm grounded again after less than a day of freedom. FML

Today, I played paintball with a bunch of friends. By the end of the day, my girlfriend and I were the only people left on the field. She shot me mercilessly, and I screamed like a little girl. 30 people watched, 4 people filmed. FML

#20179414
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9924) - you deserved it (20803)

On 11/26/2012 at 5:26am - misc - by Z (man) - Australia

Today, I woke up to my balls covered in Icy Hot, a big old "fuck you" note from my girlfriend, and my door slamming shut. I'm starting to get the distinct impression I shouldn't have made that off-hand remark last night about her PMSing, after she rage-quit a game of Mario Kart. FML

#20178502
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12864) - you deserved it (25045)

On 11/25/2012 at 5:38pm - love - by dumping time (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, a shopper approached me at Target and said, "So are you just gonna stand there to look pretty and do nothing around here?" I ignored his comment, until he got so upset that he wanted to speak to my manager. It would have been understandable if I actually worked there. FML

#20177780
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25437) - you deserved it (1816)

On 11/25/2012 at 4:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend claimed she was a Viking because she's pale and has blond hair. She also warned me that if I piss her off she'll go 'berserk' on me. She demonstrated by smacking me in the nuts with a wooden spoon. FML

#20167650
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21578) - you deserved it (3018)

On 11/18/2012 at 2:45am - love - by jasmith - United States (Texas)

Today, while at a red light, a guy in a tux and sunglasses doing the Gangnam Style passed over the crossing, followed by a man with a video camera. This isn't the first time I've stopped for people doing a Gangnam Style parody. FML

#20165330
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22097) - you deserved it (3437)

On 11/16/2012 at 10:52am - misc - by Gangnam (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I had to stand next to my wife at the supermarket, beet-red and pretending not to exist; about half an hour into our shopping, she completely lost her shit at the advertising on the loudspeaker, turned to another patron, and screamed into his face to shut the fuck up. FML

#20164356
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16495) - you deserved it (1990)

On 11/15/2012 at 2:47pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Ireland



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