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terradawndumais

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terradawndumais

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  • Number of visits : 34
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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terradawndumais's favorite FMLs

Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML

#20125076
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10955) - you deserved it (35046)

On 10/20/2012 at 9:57am - intimacy - by MIND BLOWING - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
522 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75093) - you deserved it (8791)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, my dog, who has been specially trained to go for help when I'm having a seizure, went to alert my parents downstairs that I was having an emergency. The "emergency" was me masturbating. FML

#20052579
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33734) - you deserved it (10485)

On 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm - intimacy - by thewhompingwillow (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, yet again, I was getting intimate with my shower head. Some complete genius decided to flush the toilet downstairs halfway through, which sent scalding-hot water all up in my privates. I've yet to find a comfortable sitting position. FML

#20046536
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16449) - you deserved it (38356)

On 08/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Bethany (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had to pee so bad that I ran downstairs with no glasses on and stumbled into the bathroom, half blind. I sat down on the toilet and realized just a little late that my older sister and her boyfriend were having sex in the bathtub. FML

#20042115
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35451) - you deserved it (3357)

On 08/26/2012 at 1:46am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out that my new husband is expecting two children: ours, due in January, and our 16-year-old neighbor's, due in March. FML

Today, I took a picture in front of my bathroom mirror and posted it on Facebook. When I checked it later, it had 20 comments on the picture. I was feeling good until I read the comments and looked at the picture again. I left my vibrator on the the bathroom counter. FML

#19609877
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11217) - you deserved it (58646)

On 05/12/2012 at 12:24am - intimacy - by Hunter101 (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. My mum walked in and told him to pull out and show her that he was wearing a condom, and not just saying he was. FML

#18200253
257 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56871) - you deserved it (8430)

On 11/09/2011 at 7:55am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML

#17685496
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30372) - you deserved it (4814)

On 09/07/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Nublet (woman) - United States

Today, I had to dig up my twin boys birth certificates for baseball registration. Turns out I had been calling both of them by the other twin's name for eight and a half years. FML

#16847763
277 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17486) - you deserved it (61374)

On 06/25/2011 at 9:39am - kids - by beekeke45 - United States (New Hampshire)

Today, I found out the real reason why me and my boyfriend of four and a half months have "so much in common". He used to be my stalker, who followed me around in a black hoodie and always posted stuff on my Myspace as an anonymous person. FML

#14888727
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33933) - you deserved it (5617)

On 02/07/2011 at 10:22pm - love - by Hopeless -

Today, my best friend lost her virginity in the backseat of a car. I was sitting in the front. FML

Today, I realized that I'm a sleepwalker and for the past week, that dream where I was giving my roommate a blowjob was real. He just pretended it never happened. FML

#6494612
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30289) - you deserved it (4515)

On 11/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by chacha - United States

Today, I realized that I'm a sleepwalker and for the past week, that dream where I was giving my roommate a blowjob was real. He just pretended it never happened. FML

#6494612
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30289) - you deserved it (4515)

On 11/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by chacha - United States

Today, I found out my mom was getting remarried, to my dad. He's been in prison for five years because he pushed her out a window. FML

#5116471
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54412) - you deserved it (2167)

On 09/07/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by kennedygeeee (woman) - United States (Georgia)



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