About taytoc : I like singing :D
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In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
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taytoc's favorite FMLs
Today, I discovered a tick on my penis. After a long battle, he finally let go. Four hours later I'm in the hospital. My penis is twice the normal size. I may have won the battle but lost the war. FML
by John jacob / 06/13/2011 at 2:25am / United States (Georgia) / Intimacy
Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML
by Anonymous / 06/09/2011 at 4:32pm / United States (New Mexico) / Animals
Today, my fiancé nervously sat me down for a "serious chat". The chat wound up with him asking if we could postpone our wedding, because his World of Warcraft guild had a raid scheduled for the same day. FML
by Anonymous / 06/03/2011 at 7:16pm / United States / Love
by wtfiswrongwithher / 05/07/2011 at 9:56am / Australia (Queensland) / Love
Today, I once again told my son he needed a job and a girlfriend because I simply could not keep him in my house anymore. He yelled, "No, I can do whatever I want!" Then went back to playing video games. He's 38. FML
by rastafarimon / 04/17/2011 at 1:56am / United States (Arizona) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 04/03/2011 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, I am taking a 16 hour flight. Five minutes in, the lady on one side has clipped her toenails onto me and the guy on the other side has the most horrific gas I have ever smelled. To help this problem he bought a cheese plate from the stewardess. 15 hours and 55 minutes to go. FML
by Anonymous / 03/21/2011 at 2:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation
by dumped / 03/10/2011 at 4:42pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love
Today, I was in the bathroom, when someone came up behind me. Instead of waiting for a urinal to free up, he wedged his way in between me and another guy, and promptly began peeing in my urinal, crossing streams in the process. FML
by devinbyrne / 03/05/2011 at 3:26pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 02/20/2011 at 10:28pm / Canada / Health
by Heretique / 02/09/2011 at 4:30am / Norway (Finnmark) / Miscellaneous
Today, I had a stranger scream at me that I was a whore and I was trying to steal her boyfriend. She then said my full name, stating my previous hair colour, my recent activities and that her boyfriend had been my year nine dance partner. I officially have a stalker. FML
by dadum / 01/27/2011 at 2:17am / Australia (New South Wales) / Love
Today, I found the birthday card my grandma had mailed. Apparently, it contained a gift of $100. Too bad it was in my mom's trash can, opened, with no money. She told my grandma it must have gotten lost in the mail. FML
by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 12:20am / United States (California) / Kids
- 1Today, my religious dad caught my brother jerking off and decided to give us both a lecture about… 2Today, I discovered, after years of being grounded for losing my belongings, that I didn't actually… 3Today, eight tornados hit the town where I live. The only person who tried to get a hold of me and…