taycandy96

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taycandy96

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14908
  • Number of comments : 225
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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taycandy96's page activity

Visits<b>angelnursery</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 1:12am<b>moosemanjinkurs</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 2:16pm<b>SweetSociopathy</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 8:03pm<b>Illuminati_</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 8:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:31pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:11am<b>AshleeDanielle_</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:53pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:40am<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:18pm<b>awesomeamandas</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:33am<b>jdkfbdbd</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Coryj1220</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:05pm<b>AnimeRules1125</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 1:14am<b>insomniacdreamer</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 7:52pm<b>amybopper</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 3:46pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 5:17pm<b>plateface1998</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 1:11pm<b>DHRafa</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 5:11am

taycandy96's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

taycandy96's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking with my father on the phone when I mentioned I wanted to stay at school over the summer and work. He asked if it would be lonely with the campus empty, when I replied that my friends would be working here too. He asked: "What, all two of them?" FML

by halebop / 04/06/2009 at 1:26am / United States (West Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML

by GuitarChick42 / 04/04/2009 at 2:15pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

by Anonymous / 03/31/2009 at 1:40am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I overheard a conversation two of my friends were having about Homer, so I interjected with a quip about a Simpson's episode I had seen before. They were talking about the poet. I'm an AP literature student. FML

by apenglishstudent / 03/31/2009 at 1:12am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend and she was grabbing the fat on my stomach I said to her "stop touching my fat". She replied "so don't touch you at all?" FML

by justinherass / 03/28/2009 at 1:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

by coughandcold / 03/26/2009 at 9:45pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

by Tourist / 03/26/2009 at 3:19am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was cutting a bagel, only to slice the back of my hand with the knife. As I grabbed paper towels to clean up the blood, I noticed that the bagel was pre-sliced. FML

by IHateBagels / 03/22/2009 at 2:43pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

by Mike / 03/21/2009 at 11:38am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

Today, my husband of 9 years announced he was gay. He insinuated that he was only able to achieve erections because I looked like a man. FML

by jilted / 03/21/2009 at 3:15am / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML

by cjj325 / 03/20/2009 at 7:35pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I saw my boyfriend for the last time for two years. When we got back from dinner, we sat in his truck for a little while to talk. A few minutes later, my mom comes flying out of my house screaming, "Satan is here, and he is tempting you!" That is the last memory he will have of me. FML

by Fwick / 03/19/2009 at 12:42am / United States (Utah) / Love

Today, I was taking a shower with my new boyfriend for the first time. Last night was the first night we spent together. As I was washing my hair, I looked down at my feet and noticed yellow water. Some of the warm water I felt on my feet was not from the shower head. FML

by Marcela / 03/18/2009 at 9:47am / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a shower with my new boyfriend for the first time. Last night was the first night we spent together. As I was washing my hair, I looked down at my feet and noticed yellow water. Some of the warm water I felt on my feet was not from the shower head. FML

by Marcela / 03/18/2009 at 9:47am / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, while I was out to eat, I was approached by the restaurant manager. He told me that while he respected my personal choices, his patrons didn't feel comfortable with someone who used to be a man using the women's restroom. He thought I was a transsexual. I am a naturally-born female. FML

by Noname / 03/17/2009 at 9:24pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous