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taycandy96

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taycandy96

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 9862
  • Number of comments : 225
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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taycandy96's page activity

Visits<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:18pm<b>awesomeamandas</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:33am<b>jdkfbdbd</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Coryj1220</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:05pm<b>AnimeRules1125</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 1:14am<b>insomniacdreamer</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 7:52pm<b>amybopper</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 3:46pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 5:17pm<b>plateface1998</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 1:11pm<b>DHRafa</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 5:11am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 3:21am<b>xsweeneyx</b> - the 11/25/2013 at 12:41pm<b>ahd94</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 10:37pm<b>lawnchair44</b> - the 08/13/2013 at 1:37am<b>AwakwardIsMe</b> - the 06/22/2013 at 10:33pm<b>only1time</b> - the 06/20/2013 at 7:16pm<b>AZdabest17</b> - the 06/15/2013 at 3:34pm<b>perdix</b> - the 04/16/2010 at 7:40am

taycandy96's FML badges

50 favourites

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taycandy96's favorite FMLs

Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML

#927361
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96443) - you deserved it (4567)

On 04/12/2009 at 2:11pm - animals - by spiderhater (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went for a lunch interview for my dream job. The interview was great and at the end, I tried to seal the deal by complimenting my future boss. I said, "You're really hardworking. Do you always work on a Saturday?" He looked at me, smiled and then wrote something down. Today's Friday. FML

#897398
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13062) - you deserved it (54444)

On 04/10/2009 at 3:06am - work - by sifa (man) - Malaysia (Kuala Lumpur)

Today, my mom asked me to look through old VHS tapes to throw away, I found one that said "Ashley's kindergarten Play-'95", I put the tape in, it begins to play, only to see "Days of our lives", "Melrose Place", and "ER". My childhood memories are ranked lower than tv shows. FML

#863008
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53790) - you deserved it (3087)

On 04/07/2009 at 10:53pm - love - by 4gottenmemories (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML

#836792
925 comments

I agree, your life sucks (348591) - you deserved it (38612)

On 04/06/2009 at 3:39pm - misc - by creepermagnet (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was talking with my father on the phone when I mentioned I wanted to stay at school over the summer and work. He asked if it would be lonely with the campus empty, when I replied that my friends would be working here too. He asked: "What, all two of them?" FML

#829744
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49919) - you deserved it (4608)

On 04/06/2009 at 1:26am - misc - by halebop (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, I thought I heard my little sister playing on my brand new grand piano. Angry, I ran downstairs to stop her. My parents were having sex. On my piano. FML

#800425
344 comments

I agree, your life sucks (283516) - you deserved it (19079)

On 04/04/2009 at 2:15pm - intimacy - by GuitarChick42 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. After what seemed like an eternity of waiting, he finally entered me, then paused and asked me, "what do I do now?" FML

#718937
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (129488) - you deserved it (14555)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:40am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I overheard a conversation two of my friends were having about Homer, so I interjected with a quip about a Simpson's episode I had seen before. They were talking about the poet. I'm an AP literature student. FML

#718521
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12456) - you deserved it (65097)

On 03/31/2009 at 1:12am - misc - by apenglishstudent (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while lying in bed with my girlfriend and she was grabbing the fat on my stomach I said to her "stop touching my fat". She replied "so don't touch you at all?" FML

#656486
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49952) - you deserved it (22836)

On 03/28/2009 at 1:43am - misc - by justinherass (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling sick and having trouble breathing easily. I decided to take a nap and apparently ended up sleeping with my mouth wide open since breathing was an issue. I woke up to my boyfriend trying to put his penis in my mouth. FML

#632473
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (168452) - you deserved it (34078)

On 03/26/2009 at 9:45pm - intimacy - by coughandcold (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was cutting a bagel, only to slice the back of my hand with the knife. As I grabbed paper towels to clean up the blood, I noticed that the bagel was pre-sliced. FML

#531777
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28270) - you deserved it (76218)

On 03/22/2009 at 2:43pm - health - by IHateBagels (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had to sleep in the same room as my grandparents. They checked to see if I was asleep, so I pretended to be to avoid getting scolded for staying up. Turns out they were checking so that they could make love. I witnessed two 70-year-olds have sex in the bed next to me for 20 minutes. FML

#507959
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (212791) - you deserved it (27347)

On 03/21/2009 at 11:38am - intimacy - by Mike (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went skinny-dipping with my best friend. We were on the beach and it was fairly crowded but we got in the water at this really secluded area. While we were swimming I looked up to see a homeless man wearing my clothes, walking away. FML

#495475
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56147) - you deserved it (29216)

On 03/20/2009 at 7:35pm - misc - by cjj325 (woman) - United States (Illinois)



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