taycandy96

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taycandy96

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 14011
  • Number of comments : 225
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

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taycandy96's page activity

Visits<b>angelnursery</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 1:12am<b>moosemanjinkurs</b> - the 12/12/2015 at 2:16pm<b>SweetSociopathy</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 8:03pm<b>Illuminati_</b> - the 07/02/2015 at 8:46pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 4:31pm<b>Damafia</b> - the 11/19/2014 at 11:11am<b>AshleeDanielle_</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 5:53pm<b>TEZZ</b> - the 10/21/2014 at 9:40am<b>Eyeslick</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 1:18pm<b>awesomeamandas</b> - the 08/11/2014 at 8:33am<b>jdkfbdbd</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 9:47pm<b>Coryj1220</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 3:05pm<b>AnimeRules1125</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 1:14am<b>insomniacdreamer</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 7:52pm<b>amybopper</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 3:46pm<b>DippinGrizzly907</b> - the 04/03/2014 at 5:17pm<b>plateface1998</b> - the 03/11/2014 at 1:11pm<b>DHRafa</b> - the 01/30/2014 at 5:11am

taycandy96's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

taycandy96's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up to an early Christmas present on my car. It was a nicely wrapped box containing a dead bird, a half eaten sandwich, and a note reading "MERRY F**KING CHRISTMAS STAN." This will probably be my only Christmas present. My name is Luke. FML

by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 9:36pm / United States (Georgia) / Animals

Today, my 21 year old boyfriend asked me what foreplay is. FML

by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 6:02pm / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was in a dating auction. I was bought for $2. The man who won a date with me recited every dialog from the movie The Lord of the Rings. FML

by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 3:04am / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML

by unfortunatelyunlucky / 12/12/2010 at 2:17am / United States (Washington) / Transportation

Today, my boyfriend of almost two years proposed to me. Everything was perfect. The ring was beautiful. And seconds after I said yes he went to play his new xbox game. FML

by Anonymous / 12/12/2010 at 1:08am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, I got married. Tonight, I received the best orgasm of my life. Not from my husband; from the jacuzzi tub in our honeymoon suite, where he was passed out drunk. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2010 at 9:20pm / United States (Montana) / Intimacy

Today, my mother called to uninvite me from Christmas, my ex-wife is going and she doesn't want it to be awkward for her. FML

by kingkarnie / 12/11/2010 at 8:55pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

by stifledbyyou / 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, while I was working at McDonald's, a man and his wife ordered a Sundae. I gave the guy his sundae and realized I'd forgotten something. I said, "One second sir. Let me grab your nuts." I realized what I said when his wife gave me the death glare. FML

by stifledbyyou / 12/11/2010 at 7:06pm / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, my family and I went Christmas tree shopping. My husband and I were walking around when I saw the perfect tree. Excited, we immediately bought it. When we got home and set it up, I realized it came with a present: termites. FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2010 at 3:49pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my thirteen month old son woke me up at 6AM on my day off, by punching me in the eye. FML

by blueberry_hill / 12/11/2010 at 11:16am / United States (Kansas) / Kids

Today, I got dumped by my girlfriend at her mom's birthday party, in front of her whole family. They even got it on video. FML

by Marlon / 12/11/2010 at 3:18am / United States / Love

Today, I was at a house delivering pizza. As I walked away, I heard the mom mutter to her child, "That's why you go to college." FML

by Anonymous / 12/11/2010 at 2:04am / United States (Washington) / Work

Today, my parents brought me an ice cream birthday cake. I would think after 23 years they would remember my lactose intolerance. FML

by ShaunBomb / 12/11/2010 at 1:11am / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to clean bathroom duties at work. Someone wrote "Merry Christmas" on the wall in their own shit. FML

by Anonymous / 12/10/2010 at 11:59pm / Canada (Ontario) / Work