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Today, I was having lunch at McDonald's when I dropped a French fry down my shirt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it, a creepy man picked it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML
Today, I found out that the sleazy guy I met with a few days ago decided to move into my home town to "be closer" to me. I've already told him I'm not interested in him, but he still continues to ask me out. FML
Today, I have a cat with separation anxiety. By this, I mean whenever I go in another room and shut the door with her outside, she uses her head as a battering ram to try and break down the door. It's fun trying to sleep too. FML
Today, I went on a date, the first one I've been on since my last boyfriend broke up with me 6 months ago. We were in a restaurant, and at the end of meal he insisted on paying the bill. He wanted to leave a 15% tip but couldn't work out in his head how much to leave. The bill was for £100. FML
Today, I got a call from my long distance girlfriend. She's about a month pregnant. I haven't seen her in person for six months, but she still insists it's mine. I don't know which would be worse: her lying or her being that stupid. FML
Friday 2 October 2015