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tartar18

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tartar18

5Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 2 January 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 728
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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tartar18's page activity

Visits<b>seetei</b> - the 05/03/2015 at 11:38pm<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 04/22/2015 at 8:10am<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 3:41pm<b>DA_JUDGE123</b> - the 04/20/2015 at 1:30am<b>Andrewski12</b> - the 04/19/2015 at 7:42pm<b>Markovski</b> - the 04/18/2015 at 9:57am<b>MistyKittyx</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 3:13pm<b>callalilley</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 6:56am<b>dakatabg</b> - the 04/13/2015 at 2:16am<b>MechanicKayla</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 7:14pm<b>IceMan11</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 12:00pm<b>ligerzero459</b> - the 04/06/2015 at 10:02am<b>connorgrant98</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 11:05pm<b>Scryll</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 10:44pm<b>sarkycow</b> - the 04/05/2015 at 10:22pm<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 03/25/2015 at 6:54am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 6:17am<b>knightofdarkness</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 3:57am

Fucked!<b>seetei</b> - yesterday at 5:39am<b>khoov19</b> - the 03/22/2015 at 11:17am<b>lexiieeex3</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 9:11am<b>kspear2</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 6:37pm<b>EverestMelting</b> - the 09/05/2014 at 2:33pm

tartar18's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

See all of tartar18's badges

tartar18's favorite FMLs

Today, I pulled a piece of dental floss out of my ass. How it got there is one of life's great mysteries. FML

#21403757
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26098) - you deserved it (3753)

On 05/03/2015 at 3:42am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, while walking down the street, a cute guy approached me. We ended up having some drinks then heading back to his place and hooked up. Afterwards, I used the bathroom, and when I came out, he was going through his wallet and asked me how much he owed me. FML

#21391926
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31373) - you deserved it (9501)

On 04/11/2015 at 6:05pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my husband was involved in a horrible series of accidents; he repeatedly slipped and fell into my best friend's vagina. FML

#21382840
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44619) - you deserved it (2959)

On 03/28/2015 at 5:20am - intimacy - by soontobewidow (woman) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, I had to take a dump at work. I walked into the bathroom and opened a stall, only to find what I can only describe as a fecal crime scene. It was like a turd had exploded mid-air. It was so vile, my anxiety kicked in and I broke down into a sobbing panic attack. FML

#21378385
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25856) - you deserved it (3095)

On 03/20/2015 at 12:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, I was given a new responsibility at the law firm where I work. I'm now in charge of punching holes in every single piece of paper to be found in the office, estimated to be in the hundred-thousands. The reason? I finish my daily clerical work too quickly. FML

#21372587
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25046) - you deserved it (2150)

On 03/11/2015 at 4:15pm - work - by KillMePlease (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while walking out of a store eating a candy bar, a homeless man tried to run up and steal my candy. I stuck a leg out and tripped him. The only thing I could think of to yell at him was, "Swiper no Swiping". My kids have ruined my coolness. FML

#21366982
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68) - you deserved it (19)

On 03/02/2015 at 11:57pm - misc - by Dad (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, apparently when you tell a hairdresser "A little off the sides." they hear "A bowl cut, please, and make it look extra stupid." FML

#21354162
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29464) - you deserved it (3277)

On 02/11/2015 at 3:40pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - France (Bretagne)

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday, so I decided to take her to a fancy restaurant and give her an expensive $400 necklace that I had bought. Being traditional, I asked the waiter to arrange it nicely on the tray when he came with our dessert. Neither he nor the necklace ever showed up. FML

#21329874
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40625) - you deserved it (8432)

On 01/03/2015 at 5:48am - love - by JJ_V3N0M - United States (California)

Today, thanks to some asswipe drunk driver fleeing the cops the wrong way down a one-way street, I've now had my third wreck this year. My insurance premium's now higher than Bob Marley in a weed factory. FML

#21321099
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32891) - you deserved it (3055)

On 12/20/2014 at 7:53pm - money - by financially_wreckd (man) -

Today, I came home late from work. As I got out of my car, I noticed a child-shaped silhouette in my bedroom window. I almost shat myself, since I live alone. I searched the whole house, sobbing in fear, only to find no trace of whatever or whoever I'd seen. FML

#21306286
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38318) - you deserved it (3160)

On 11/26/2014 at 3:45pm - misc - by void bowels() { cry(); } (man) - United Kingdom (Caerphilly)

Today, my husband and I told my parents I was pregnant with my first child. The only thing my father did was look at my husband and tell him his pull out game was weak. FML

#21299949
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35114) - you deserved it (3436)

On 11/16/2014 at 12:29am - kids - by wtfdad - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

#21292770
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36478) - you deserved it (2428)

On 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by spooked - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up to a text from my manager, saying "Hed's up dude, ur gettin fired tomoz. CEO's pissed. No hard feelins m8". Great. FML

#21287630
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32334) - you deserved it (2511)

On 10/29/2014 at 11:46am - work - by fired tomoz (man) - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, I went to a big job interview. As I walked in, I tripped and fell flat on my face. Other highlights include my voice cracking multiple times, sweating profusely and getting uncontrollable nervous giggling. The interviewer eventually stared at me in disbelief and asked if I was high. FML

#21285028
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33115) - you deserved it (4269)

On 10/25/2014 at 2:27pm - work - by not on life, that's for fucking sure (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend visited my restaurant with some guy I'd never seen before. She introduced him to me as her "new boyfriend". She was always a cold bitch, but I never saw this coming. I had to serve their food while choking back tears, and I couldn't work up the nerve to spit in it. FML

#21260464
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51506) - you deserved it (4993)

On 09/18/2014 at 3:32am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)



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