Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tampabayfan

Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member

tampabayfan

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 4570
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About tampabayfan : We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.

tampabayfan's page activity

Visits<b>Iwtumn</b> - the 05/02/2015 at 4:36am<b>Princess_Eevee9</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 10:17pm<b>FutBol_Fan_30</b> - the 03/12/2015 at 12:36am<b>igotds</b> - the 03/11/2015 at 6:05am<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:08pm<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 4:31am<b>Kibaruto</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 1:22pm<b>NotGabe</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 5:24pm<b>mzcupcakez</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:02am<b>TM24D</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 11:10am<b>FrutLoopDingus</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 12:49am<b>choco3782</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 5:09am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:21am<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 5:28am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 6:22am<b>Senorangelo</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 6:41pm<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 2:12pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 11:57pm

Fucked!<b>TM24D</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 5:10pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 12:15pm

tampabayfan's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

See all of tampabayfan's badges

tampabayfan's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out my mother has enough toys to open a sex shop. FML

#20499258
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41262) - you deserved it (5321)

On 02/09/2013 at 7:00am - intimacy - by Lois - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I was walking out of my girlfriend's house with her when I saw her thong drying on the rack. I picked it up, sniffed it and put it on my face as a joke. She replied with, "Those are my mother's." FML

#20461976
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12403) - you deserved it (48140)

On 01/16/2013 at 12:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, while I was having sex, he stopped, looked at me all seriously and said, "Permission to climax, ma'am?" FML

#20458937
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44580) - you deserved it (9246)

On 01/14/2013 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I bought myself a pair of beautiful, hand-crafted earrings with lighthouses on them. My mother was quick to point out the lighthouses look like dicks. I don't think I can ever wear them again. FML

Today, at a house party, I finally got the guy I've been seeing alone in his room. We started making out, and I got on top of him to take control. He responded by saying he couldn't do it because he needed to go make pizza for his friends, and then bolted out of the room. FML

#20438672
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40114) - you deserved it (9240)

On 01/02/2013 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I hid my weed stash in a bag from an expensive jewellery store. My sister walked into my room, went "Ooh, what's this?" and grabbed the bag. I grabbed it back and ad-libbed that it was her Christmas gift. Now I actually have to buy her expensive jewellery. FML

#20405613
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10982) - you deserved it (58033)

On 12/18/2012 at 1:28pm - misc - by junkie (woman) - Belgium (Antwerpen)

Today, I brought a boy over to my house to help with a history project. My mom suddenly swooped in and bombarded him with questions about his and my sex life, and how she wants to have exactly four grandchildren. FML

#20186150
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25164) - you deserved it (1915)

On 12/01/2012 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went out and bought a copy of Black Ops 2. I got home and opened the case, only to see the game disk was missing. When I went back to the store to complain, the guy at the desk accused me of trying to pull an old scam on him. FML

#20175155
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23619) - you deserved it (2329)

On 11/23/2012 at 12:20pm - money - by FUCK A FUCKING DUCK (man) - Bahamas (New Providence)

Today, my mom sold my Magic box at a garage sale because I "never use it." Locked inside it was my fake ID, a couple of hundred bucks, and a bag of weed. She can't remember who she sold it to. FML

#20170086
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16146) - you deserved it (33224)

On 11/19/2012 at 9:04pm - misc - by karmaquestionmark (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was waitressing for a huge family. Their bill was $750. Excited about the tip, I was shocked to see only $0.50. As they were leaving, I threw the two whole quarters at their heads. Guess who also got fired today. FML

#20150831
476 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18083) - you deserved it (42409)

On 11/06/2012 at 5:37pm - work - by Misunderstood Waitress (woman) - United States

Today, I looked up the side effects of the antidepressants I've recently started taking. Inability to orgasm is one of them. I can either not be depressed, or I can have an orgasm. FML

#20148960
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28806) - you deserved it (3739)

On 11/05/2012 at 2:25pm - intimacy - by HappinessOrOrgasms (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML

#20129296
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10454) - you deserved it (54395)

On 10/23/2012 at 12:25am - kids - by Bratty son (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31289) - you deserved it (6241)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, my 14-year-old step-daughter announced that she is 4 months pregnant. The father is my 15-year-old son. FML

#20111886
521 comments

I agree, your life sucks (75457) - you deserved it (8817)

On 10/11/2012 at 10:30am - kids - by wdunn69733 - United States (Georgia)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16237) - you deserved it (61292)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: