Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

tampabayfan

Offline (4 hours ago) | Search for a member

tampabayfan

2Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not so sure
  • Number of visits : 3997
  • Number of comments : 50
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

About tampabayfan : We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad.

tampabayfan's page activity

Visits<b>Bazinga_1821</b> - the 03/01/2015 at 11:08pm<b>MrsWinchester</b> - the 02/22/2015 at 4:31am<b>igotds</b> - the 02/14/2015 at 6:17pm<b>Kibaruto</b> - the 02/07/2015 at 1:22pm<b>NotGabe</b> - the 01/30/2015 at 5:24pm<b>mzcupcakez</b> - the 01/25/2015 at 6:02am<b>TM24D</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 11:10am<b>FrutLoopDingus</b> - the 01/14/2015 at 12:49am<b>choco3782</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 5:09am<b>Ghost_Kaulitz</b> - the 12/17/2014 at 11:21am<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 12/01/2014 at 5:28am<b>ClockworkPoleaxe</b> - the 11/24/2014 at 6:22am<b>Senorangelo</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 6:41pm<b>WoldowJR</b> - the 11/18/2014 at 2:12pm<b>boring_boredom</b> - the 11/17/2014 at 11:57pm<b>omgpp</b> - the 11/10/2014 at 10:46pm<b>Ley135</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 10:58pm<b>BunchieRules</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 10:27pm

Liked!<b>TM24D</b> - the 01/15/2015 at 5:10pm<b>dylanger16</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 12:15pm

tampabayfan's FML badges

The Thumb returns

You have thumbed 5000 comments.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

See all of tampabayfan's badges

tampabayfan's favorite FMLs

Today, I asked my girlfriend's father for permission to take his daughter's hand in marriage. He asked me "Which one?" I said "Uh, the one I'm dating... Lisa." He belched and said, "Yeah sure, throw 'er off a cliff for all I care. Piss off, boy." So much for chivalry. FML

#21308242
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33326) - you deserved it (3001)

On 11/29/2014 at 4:54pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, some idiot introduced my grandmother to yoga pants. FML

#21306857
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33869) - you deserved it (3197)

On 11/27/2014 at 1:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while having some "personal" time, I felt intense pleasure and moaned. I learned that my own moaning prevents me from reaching my peak. I'm my own turn off. FML

#21290790
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36483) - you deserved it (5817)

On 11/02/2014 at 8:31pm - intimacy - by SelfServiced - United States (California)

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend jerking off to what I thought was porn on his phone. He was actually beating it to Siri's voice. FML

#21280577
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36954) - you deserved it (3453)

On 10/18/2014 at 5:43pm - intimacy - by fizzie101 - United States (California)

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38430) - you deserved it (5021)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my best friend, who I've been in love with for nearly a decade, asked me to help him set up an online dating profile. During our 4-hour conversation, as he waded through the profiles, he complained that it was impossible for him to find a girl to have a meaningful conversation with. FML

#21269205
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39397) - you deserved it (5586)

On 10/01/2014 at 9:33pm - love - by EosThorn (woman) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I made up an ingenious plan to finally hook up with the guy I really like at a party. Well, the plan itself worked great. Too bad I got so drunk that I used it on the wrong person. FML

#21266978
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23573) - you deserved it (32878)

On 09/28/2014 at 12:42pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML

#21258738
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39275) - you deserved it (2282)

On 09/15/2014 at 11:51am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47664) - you deserved it (5391)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I hooked up with a girl at a club, and we had sex. She just lay there like a corpse the whole time. It got so bad, I ended up faking an orgasm and blaming the lack of semen on a botched vasectomy. She actually believed it. What the hell? FML

#21235982
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43223) - you deserved it (10409)

On 08/12/2014 at 4:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my idiot son tried to get a veteran's discount at American Eagle because he's "a fifth prestige" on Call of Duty. FML

#21233179
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42297) - you deserved it (6140)

On 08/09/2014 at 9:31am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend laid his head on my bare chest and said, "You're like my mother." FML

#21229751
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43372) - you deserved it (3974)

On 08/05/2014 at 12:40am - love - by motherlover (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my vibrator was in another room and I was too lazy to get it. I was also too lazy to do it manually. It's like I've been married to myself for too long. FML

Today, I sent my boyfriend a picture of my boobs. I quickly found out that I'd accidentally sent it to my sister instead. She sent me one back. FML

#21196202
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46125) - you deserved it (26274)

On 07/02/2014 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by boob sisters (woman) - United States (Georgia)



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Best of the Worst #12
  • Another month, another bunch of shitposts. Yes, it's time to delve into the postbag and have another look at the weird and wonderful stuff we've been sent by people from all over the world. Hope you…

Tuesday 3 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: